new song:Black And white (feed back plz)

ok well this is a song im gunna work on its callled black nad white
eeeh its not great but im 13 so eeeh lol i gave it a try



....black and white

the colors i see

black and white

i realy hope some one needs me

im tired of sitting around

life going bye too fast and

...i want it to slow right down

every minute feels like a second

.................................................

i just need some help getting through these tough times

my father diied

my aunt is trash

she stole are money

and left me for dead

im ****ed in the head

black and white

the colors i know

the colors i feel

the colors i see

im getting tired of it all......

i feel like im getting kicked in the head

but in the end.but in the end.. but in the end...

all is i see is Black and white

Black and white

black... and... white...

(true story)

It's an alright start but you can go much further. It isn't long enough to be an actual song... and your grammar is horrible... no offense I'm just saying better grammar is a better song =)