Would It Be Wrong? (Democracy)

Another bit of experimenting, this time to the tune of Cohen's "Democracy".

As for the chorus, "Would it be" = "Democracy", "wrong" = "coming".

I also chose not to follow his rhyming of the ending of the 7th and 9th line of every stanza with the ending of the chorus, simply because 'burn' doesn't easily rhyme with a lot of words - and I'd need a lot here.

** = the forum won't render the word normally, probably due to some obscenity filter.

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http://youtu.be/KqTUEP6Ndvo

I see a man who lost his job today,
I see him walking home, I see him pray.
I see him on the streets,
having failed to pay the thieves,
I see he's angry at the god who failed.
I see the youngsters beat him
and I see us all go by:
the kick, the punch, the screaming -
the curse of humankind.

Would it be wrong
to wanna see it burn?

The candle burns bright and clear
with justice, joy and tears.
It's burning at both ends
and the message that it sends
is a purifying, penetrating fear.
"I am beta, I am psi,
I'm the root of David's tree.
I bring the sea and sky to tremble
with the birth of me."

Would it be wrong
to wanna see it burn?

The light burns bright in the eyes
of vermin, men and mice.
It rides a burning horse
and it causes every cause
from Einstein to microscopic lice.
The man, the calf, the eagle
burn with equal fervency;
the strong, the wise, the feeble
race to meet their destiny.

Would it be wrong
to wanna see it burn?

Burn down, burn down
the weeds from which we grow!
May the greener be
the field of destiny
with the seeds of beauty sown.
Burn down, burn down, burn down, burn down!

Life is a double-edged b(i)t(c)h**
the fire makes her cognisance itch.
She burst from nebulae
to copulate with glee,
she gave the hairy simians a twitch.
Balaam was hers, and Jezebel
the four and twenty, too;
the holy second amendment
she brought about for you.

Would it be wrong
to wanna see it burn?

The T-Rex stands, looking at the dawn
burning red with promises forlorn.
He sees his mother Earth embrace
this promising new birth;
he knows his time has come for moving on.
He lifts his mighty lips to sing
his last halleluja-ah,
he sees this furry little thing
escape the Gomorra-ah.

Would it be wrong
to wanna see it burn?

Burn down, burn down
the weeds from which we grow!
May the greener be
the field of destiny
with the seeds of beauty sown.
Burn down, burn down, burn down, burn down!

At dusk, the light is red and warm;
we wait to see the night be born.
The dark is light asleep,
and joy is, when we weep,
more radiant than if we never mourn.
The horses race now neck and neck,
the whips are burning bright;
the wisdom of Melchizedek
is coming to its right.

Would it be wrong
to wanna see it burn?
(to wanna see it burn)

See what burn?The world at large or just the people you view as the enemy?Good song but the message vague.Don't get me wrong;I'm not saying I disagree with your views,I don't.I don't quite get "burn what down?"I only burn bridges,a chick named Diane taught me all I know.

I've read a huge assortment of literature in my long lifetime, and I think my reaction to this is a composite of all of that: To me this speaks of everything from Genesis Chapter 1 to Machiavelli and Darwin, and even Einstein's own fear of what his genius led to. In this I read the tragedy (daily headlines) of the contemporary world, and I also read the oldest warning(s) of a God who has the power to both create and to destroy:

and the message that it sends
is a purifying, penetrating fear.
"I am beta, I am psi,
I'm the root of David's tree.
I bring the sea and sky to tremble
with the birth of me."

Forgive me if I'm reading too much of my own thoughts or feelings into it, but I read so much into this from beginning to end, that I almost want to use the word "contradictions". But there is no contradiction, aside from the fact that humanity itself is a walking contradiction.

The dark is light asleep,
and joy is, when we weep,
more radiant than if we never mourn.
The horses race now neck and neck,
the whips are burning bright;
the wisdom of Melchizedek
is coming to its right.

I want to read more hope than fear into the last verse. But it also reminds me of something that Tess once had quoted on her old youtube channel, something by Kahlil Gibran... but I can't remember enough of it to find it now. Maybe she'll know what I'm talking about and post it when (not if) she reads this.

Edit: I forgot to say the obvious. This is an epic masterpiece of writing, in my humble opinion.

Originally Posted by MoonRide*r*

I

I want to read more hope than fear into the last verse. But it also reminds me of something that Tess once had quoted on her old youtube channel, something by Kahlil Gibran... but I can't remember enough of it to find it now. Maybe she'll know what I'm talking about and post it when (not if) she reads this.

Edit: I forgot to say the obvious. This is an epic masterpiece of writing, in my humble opinion.

Your friend is your needs answered.
He is your field which you sow with love
and reap with thanksgiving.
And he is your board and your fireside.
For you come to him with your hunger
and you seek him for peace.

That's all that i had quoted on my youtube page but i love the whole thing... http://www.katsandogz.com/onfriends.html

OrchestraInside i need more time to read and think about what you wrote here but i agree with Moon about "epic" and i also appreciate what you just wrote about beta and psi.

Yea this site uses filters bcs they're very conscious that kids as young as 13 can legally join this site, but also anyone with an Internet connection can read anything thats posted in the public forums....and i even hesitate over some of the songs that i post now and then

Or were you thinking about this Moon? "The deeper sorrow carves into your being the more joy you can contain"....bcs to me that fits more with this...

The dark is light asleep,
and joy is, when we weep,
more radiant than if we never mourn.

not in exactly the same way but it made me think of that line by Gibran.

Tess hun, I'm sure it was an aggregate sum of recollections that made me think about your love for Khalil Gibran as I absorbed these two lines:

and joy is, when we weep,
more radiant than if we never mourn

Originally Posted by OrchestraInside

Hope is for fools, the other side of desperation. The important question is - of what is made the coin they are two sides of?

Great question, the answer to which is a little different for everyone.

Desperation is an animalism that can't see its way out of the present. Hope is a vapor that always looks past the present. True happiness is somewhere in between: It can only come in recognizing that the present is the only reality that we'll ever have. “One regret ... that I am determined not to have when I am lying on my deathbed, is that I did not kiss you enough.”

Originally Posted by MoonRide*r*

“One regret ... that I am determined not to have when I am lying on my deathbed, is that I did not kiss you enough.”

so no regrets ok?
Does the present exist or not?

OrchestraInside, Moon even loves to debate himself sometimes

Originally Posted by OrchestraInside

...however I feel this would become too explicit, and limit the text too much, so I kept "it".

I like poetry that leaves a little smth unsaid, as long as it makes sense as a whole or has a clear point. I don't like playing games with serious subjects but in creative writing i think its great to leave a little work for the audience to do.....even if we don't quite get it i prefer that to saying too much.

Originally Posted by Teshka

OrchestraInside, Moon even loves to debate himself sometimes

And I really hate it when my other self starts talking politics!

Originally Posted by OrchestraInside

First there must be intention - an idea, a thought, a vision; then there must be clothes. Adding glitter for no purpose other than vanity is seldom helpful. Hopefully, they reveal just enough, and perhaps more the more one touches them. Words never carry a message: they simply ignite one that was already there, sometimes unbeknownst to us.

That part about clothes reminded me that I still don't know everything Tess was thinking when she added that line at the top of her signature. She won't tell me. But yeah, and I also think we read or hear something different every time we return to something we've encountered before.

A friend at work just read this and she thought it was great that you ended with Melchizedek.....watching and waiting for the time to give God his opinion...burn or not...and then she said that's the way God will do it the next time, with fire.

Originally Posted by OrchestraInside

And man, standing on the brink of destruction in the early 21st century, is racing two horses against each other: one of change and survival, the other of stagnation and destruction. The whip of economic growth and consumption, and that of sustainable living and peaceful co-operation, are burning red in the setting sun.

I thought it was interesting that you put those 2 pairs together instead of the opposite and i understand why, it makes sense and its true, but i often have the feeling that now we can only survive by slowing or stopping certain types of change.....and i would love so much to make time stand still for me right now...but also that its too late, we have already progressed too far and so now apocalyptic change is the only cure for this world.

and so...if i were Melchizedek i might advise God to "burn".......but not till Moon can finish building us that beautiful little place on an island near New Zealand where we can escape the fire