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  1. #581
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    Here Template is, thanks for your patience
    He spits, the temp raises, by degrees without equations
    Makes elevators travel sideways, horizontal calculations
    With vertical aspirations
    Aspire to inspire through the use of fluid movements
    A fire's required for the amusement of these students
    Its why I spit hot for the improvement of my pupils
    One of whom is a prudent student but a nuisance proven to be useless
    His slight improvement brought him illusions of reducing humans lyrical pollution
    Goes by the name Monster, father of hypocrisy
    If only 'Pac could see,
    then he'd be voted out of this forum thru democracy

    To start with
    Rap's a unique art meant solely for artists
    How can you claim another's style yet say you the hardest?
    Reputation tarnished
    Garbage, lyricism committing auditory carnage

    I tear Monster apart, leave his carcass heartless
    Monster forever in darkness
    I got sunlight to farm bars for harvest,
    Never steal crops (props) from another battler's market
    Harness the ability to stay the sharpest Marksman
    Targets get sparked from the farthest Garden
    Madison stays Square if the Monster is guard-less
    See what i did there? No, your blind Helen Keller regardless.
    Hell, I'll kill him with smartness
    Question: Whats the by-product that forms from a deformed narcissist?
    Quasimodo, or his sloppy homo, son Monster; its hard to pick.

    Conceal your hand, I see through your deceiving plans
    Easy to flip your "name" like i deal ecstasy: the new "E man".
    Didn't notice the W in between your name Monster, till your mom just stuttered
    Wet rapper, White rapper, maybe chocolate covered
    Washed out rapper, Whack rapper, Eat em' all like omelettes buttered

    The secrets out now we know what the W means
    All over the screen, any scheme you perceive cannot be redeemed
    Its not what it seems,
    Opposite of a particle beam
    Part of you dreams
    About eating out the elites, so you start with their cream
    Departing the scene with flowers in the part of your jeans
    Before the gay action could happen, Max thwarted your scene
    Chopped you clean
    Severed your sixteen and passed it for me to endeavor unseen

    Harry potter, Hunger Games, Divergent
    If this monster was in any of these books he would die a virgin
    Urine wreaking vermin in need of detergent
    To merge in
    The league of another linguistic surgeon
    Realms above his simplistic verses
    He curses, the fact his raps lack a ballistic surface
    Hurts him inside, he asks for mystic nurses
    If Black wrote in cursive, he'd replicate and rehearse it
    If 'Mack joined the circus, he'd purchase tickets till his nervousness worsens
    If _S was the type of person who wore turbans, he'd use it as a curtain
    and worship it for certain.
    If Temp drops a tape, he'd emerge as the first to spit a similar version.

    Monster ain't wild, not a bear or fox.
    Scared in a box
    Wondering if "deep down", your actually "shallow"....universal paradox

  2. The Following User Says Thank You to Template For This Useful Post:
    taylormaximus (05-14-2015)

  3. #582
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    Quote Originally Posted by Template View Post
    Here Template is, thanks for your patience
    He spits, the temp raises, by degrees without equations
    Makes elevators travel sideways, horizontal calculations
    With vertical aspirations
    Aspire to inspire through the use of fluid movements
    A fire's required for the amusement of these students
    Its why I spit hot for the improvement of my pupils
    One of whom is a prudent student but a nuisance proven to be useless
    His slight improvement brought him illusions of reducing humans lyrical pollution
    Goes by the name Monster, father of hypocrisy
    If only 'Pac could see,
    then he'd be voted out of this forum thru democracy

    To start with
    Rap's a unique art meant solely for artists
    How can you claim another's style yet say you the hardest?
    Reputation tarnished
    Garbage, lyricism committing auditory carnage

    I tear Monster apart, leave his carcass heartless
    Monster forever in darkness
    I got sunlight to farm bars for harvest,
    Never steal crops (props) from another battler's market
    Harness the ability to stay the sharpest Marksman
    Targets get sparked from the farthest Garden
    Madison stays Square if the Monster is guard-less
    See what i did there? No, your blind Helen Keller regardless.
    Hell, I'll kill him with smartness
    Question: Whats the by-product that forms from a deformed narcissist?
    Quasimodo, or his sloppy homo, son Monster; its hard to pick.

    Conceal your hand, I see through your deceiving plans
    Easy to flip your "name" like i deal ecstasy: the new "E man".
    Didn't notice the W in between your name Monster, till your mom just stuttered
    Wet rapper, White rapper, maybe chocolate covered
    Washed out rapper, Whack rapper, Eat em' all like omelettes buttered

    The secrets out now we know what the W means
    All over the screen, any scheme you perceive cannot be redeemed
    Its not what it seems,
    Opposite of a particle beam
    Part of you dreams
    About eating out the elites, so you start with their cream
    Departing the scene with flowers in the part of your jeans
    Before the gay action could happen, Max thwarted your scene
    Chopped you clean
    Severed your sixteen and passed it for me to endeavor unseen

    Harry potter, Hunger Games, Divergent
    If this monster was in any of these books he would die a virgin
    Urine wreaking vermin in need of detergent
    To merge in
    The league of another linguistic surgeon
    Realms above his simplistic verses
    He curses, the fact his raps lack a ballistic surface
    Hurts him inside, he asks for mystic nurses
    If Black wrote in cursive, he'd replicate and rehearse it
    If 'Mack joined the circus, he'd purchase tickets till his nervousness worsens
    If _S was the type of person who wore turbans, he'd use it as a curtain
    and worship it for certain.
    If Temp drops a tape, he'd emerge as the first to spit a similar version.

    Monster ain't wild, not a bear or fox.
    Scared in a box
    Wondering if "deep down", your actually "shallow"....universal paradox
    I gotta make time for this, this is my pad and pen date,
    So I'm sorry my verse'll probably be shorter but template,
    I could write a 16 bar in 99 seconds, you can spend 10 days,
    Tryna make sense of my bars, and emulate the success, Senior no Compredez,
    You're a linguistic surgeon, So you should be used to it when i dissect you,
    Your mum should've rubbed her clit, your dad should've masturbated,
    Corpus spongiosum slit, chordae tendinae lacerated,
    As a surgeon you should know if you're spitting hot,
    Your negative feedback response would be exaggerated,
    Lying on the floor, sweating, looking for somewhere to hide,
    Don't ever try to f*ck with me when it comes to these clever rhymes,
    I'll go back in time and prescribe your mum Thalidomide,
    Cos she had that morning sickness when she looked in the mirror,
    Baby comes out deformed, she blames herself she's a sinner,
    Didn't always pray to the Lord before she went and ate her dinner,
    Didn't like sleeping with your dad, preferred random guys of tinder,
    Normally, an expectant mother would be sad to hear about deformity,
    But as their marriage was a sham, she saw it as just a formality,
    She didn't even want a family, but your dad did,
    So she got the responsibility of raising this crippled kid,
    And every day she f*cking regretted that you managed to live,
    Couldn't do sh*t for yourself, she had to do everything for ya,
    Eventually enough was enough, she had to get a lawyer,
    Took everything but you, you were only four years,
    old, I regret exposing you but you're lucky its anonymous and noone knows you,
    But your forum names synonymous, and you did it so you,
    remember them days,when growing up, the struggles you went through,
    and you went through plenty, Feeling yourself becoming more alone and more empty,
    So you went and joined a forum where you could have a clean slate,
    It was all you making up for not matching your own DNA template.

  4. #583
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    fluke...fluke..fluke


    Kenny your lines are long and useless
    Redundant as your future is
    Your mother was a hore and bich
    attempted suicide instances stain your wrist
    on your sheets, stained, not blood from enemies carcasses
    but from your mothers tampon change
    when she asked kenny to play a game and insert in the cave

    Kenny was never brave, thats why when his friends jumped of the building
    kenny counted on three and stayed
    a splattering of brains, kenny rushed and got an erection that lasted for days
    as he saw dead bodies on the pavement he pondered rap names

    kenny never dies cuz his friends showed him the way humans fly
    kenny always lies cuz kenny was a small fry who had to make a pretend life
    cuz depression choked him like his daddys dik, when lil kenny tried to spit
    before his daddy decided his punishment was over with

    kenny was an average kid
    that imagined abusing animals
    cuz he had no friends
    his cat went missing when his girlfriend dumped him
    his dogs dik went into the kitchen for his fathers meal that evening
    kenny has no feelins'
    thats why when he writes his average lines his pride, he dont feel it

    Kenny you sniveling little bich
    youre displaying an untasteful side of rap battling
    that i didnt know existed, quit your sentence construction
    quit your childhood explanations, quit talk of dna
    your temp will raise when i refuse to respond with thanks
    like youre okay.. no way. youre half of monsters brain
    you cannot match with tay,
    im the gladiator that dont wait for thumbs
    or for westboro baptist rallies
    when im slaughtering gays with guns
    purchased from some terrorist that made jokes about 9-eleven
    like that day was fun...

    i make sounds like im happy, when i eat still breathing bodies
    and continue with the turrent of ammo rippin into everybody

    forced lines are sloppy, like me after murdering a whole lobby
    you make it into a hobby, being a wannabe..
    makes me wanna see kenny leave, definitely
    im infinite to your finite ending
    repeat and repeat until i dont have to keep hinting
    that your desmise starts when I write your threats subtly

    when stars war, you watch star wars
    when planets are torn and galaxies explored
    kenny masturbates to mommy on his bedroom floor
    cuz mommys the only one that encourages kenny to stay alive more
    Last edited by taylormaximus; 05-14-2015 at 06:38 AM. Reason: baptist, and clicked reply before i was done.

  5. #584
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    Quote Originally Posted by taylormaximus View Post
    fluke...fluke..fluke


    Kenny your lines are long and useless
    Redundant as your future is
    Your mother was a hore and bich
    attempted suicide instances stain your wrist
    on your sheets, stained, not blood from enemies carcasses
    but from your mothers tampon change
    when she asked kenny to play a game and insert in the cave

    Kenny was never brave, thats why when his friends jumped of the building
    kenny counted on three and stayed
    a splattering of brains, kenny rushed and got an erection that lasted for days
    as he saw dead bodies on the pavement he pondered rap names

    kenny never dies cuz his friends showed him the way humans fly
    kenny always lies cuz kenny was a small fry who had to make a pretend life
    cuz depression choked him like his daddys dik, when lil kenny tried to spit
    before his daddy decided his punishment was over with

    kenny was an average kid
    that imagined abusing animals
    cuz he had no friends
    his cat went missing when his girlfriend dumped him
    his dogs dik went into the kitchen for his fathers meal that evening
    kenny has no feelins'
    thats why when he writes his average lines his pride, he dont feel it

    Kenny you sniveling little bich
    youre displaying an untasteful side of rap battling
    that i didnt know existed, quit your sentence construction
    quit your childhood explanations, quit talk of dna
    your temp will raise when i refuse to respond with thanks
    like youre okay.. no way. youre half of monsters brain
    you cannot match with tay,
    im the gladiator that dont wait for thumbs
    or for westboro baptist rallies
    when im slaughtering gays with guns
    purchased from some terrorist that made jokes about 9-eleven
    like that day was fun...

    i make sounds like im happy, when i eat still breathing bodies
    and continue with the turrent of ammo rippin into everybody

    forced lines are sloppy, like me after murdering a whole lobby
    you make it into a hobby, being a wannabe..
    makes me wanna see kenny leave, definitely
    im infinite to your finite ending
    repeat and repeat until i dont have to keep hinting
    that your desmise starts when I write your threats subtly

    when stars war, you watch star wars
    when planets are torn and galaxies explored
    kenny masturbates to mommy on his bedroom floor
    cuz mommys the only one that encourages kenny to stay alive more
    Sometimes someone has to beat to the ground,
    To be able to gain the ability to astound,
    But that sh*ts a template thats too commonly found,
    You keep telling me to quit, like you'll still be around,
    After I finish dismantling you, this is the witty lyricist versus the clown.

    Now i could go on a tangent and use all kinds of a reference,
    Or i could take your masculinity, use the scalpel to slit in half your vas deferens,
    You got that mindset that a mouse like you will scare elephants,
    But how you gonna rhyme against an entity composed entirely of malevolence,
    Planets being torn? B*tch i can split elements,
    Don't pretend for a second that you can spit eloquent,
    I'm on a whole another league, not tryna make a scene,
    But i'll have you scared of every screen, like them b*tches from Scream,
    How'd I do it? How do i go and spit this mean?
    It depends on the level of my competitors, i find the average, the mean,
    But you tremble cos i'm a predator, you're just average, i mean,
    You repeated fluke three times like that ****'ll add emphasis,
    Definitely stretching **** out for the maximus,
    I'll be honest mate you just weren't meant for this,
    Like me laying in the sun, tryna undergo photosynthesis,
    You made a lot of South park references in your bars, i like that,
    You're gonna end up worse than that ginger kid that Eric Cartman smiled at,
    Its funny how you talk about eating bodies,
    Thats when i know you aint putting time into your lines, they're getting sloppy,
    I'm a medical student, what's a dead body to me?
    I see a body embalmed, go to McDonalds, Pizza Hut or KFC, for lunch,
    But be glad, this is history, you're witnessing the launch,
    Of a major name in the game you just watch,
    You'll probably touch on that in your reply,
    But remember how much you think you've bodied me, Kenny Never Dies.

  6. #585
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    A dead body to you is what the coroner rules as rape
    Im the reason the bodys dead, but its your dna
    on her postmortem lips that ensures your fate
    you sick kid. Demented..and youre right. half way
    i did touch on your fast food references
    cuz the rest of what you wrote was embellished
    like my emphasis... There was no relevance..

    The ambulance you ride in,while hidin an erection
    you get from wounds and infections
    was set to detonate when max is beatin
    which is why you keep ridin with bomb beepin
    cuz max is still asleep when you reply seethin'
    teeth bared like a demon,

    max has plenty of practice
    battlin' myths. He's better than a catholic exorcist
    except...he dont touch little kids with physical intent
    just verbal instructions, like this is how you rap fluent

    i split a c,
    we got symmetry
    split a sea, I lead the people to greener pastures
    Rap demands this from the visionaries
    while those that never die, receive immortal laughter
    at the cost of their life, they to fall to gladiator slaughter

    like a natural disaster that barely missed
    I gave you a chance to recover wit
    instead you got worse when you called me a mouse...
    where was the damage inflicted..?
    On your walls in your house, you got mad when max tactically
    called you out

    your raps bended, when tay snapped your sentences
    anger management a therapist suggested

    but to your discretion your attending remained annonymous
    except being the mouse i was the shrink?
    Then told the whole forum of your identity

    elephant, ivory. teeth are too short to do any damage
    except to your own mouth, so you have an advantage
    when committing self mutilation for sympathetic glances

    you like fast food cuz its food served fast,
    skip the beverage, who needs code blue mnt dew
    when you have code blue in the hospital room
    shes on the last breath, maybe youll be the one to defib check
    as you shocked chest, you astounded doctors when you orgasmed
    from her near death experience

    cuz youre a medical student. You call it "experimenting"
    when cops are like kenny whatchu doing when youre caught
    fondling bodies not breatheing

    Jokes about fast food makes me wonder what facility your mental isnt in
    your bodys in an asylum.
    your conscious is outside on the run, cant catch him.

    shutter, cuz youre on a deserted island
    in your mind every things fine
    thats why you you sit outside suckin sunlight
    pretending to be a flower, man.
    but your just a weed needin' pullin'
    and im the obvious mexican to do it

    This launch is history, written by me
    the conqueror decides the story, and for that you gain no glory
    goodbye kenny your life is quite boring.

  7. #586
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    Quote Originally Posted by taylormaximus View Post
    A dead body to you is what the coroner rules as rape
    Im the reason the bodys dead, but its your dna
    on her postmortem lips that ensures your fate
    you sick kid. Demented..and youre right. half way
    i did touch on your fast food references
    cuz the rest of what you wrote was embellished
    like my emphasis... There was no relevance..

    The ambulance you ride in,while hidin an erection
    you get from wounds and infections
    was set to detonate when max is beatin
    which is why you keep ridin with bomb beepin
    cuz max is still asleep when you reply seethin'
    teeth bared like a demon,

    max has plenty of practice
    battlin' myths. He's better than a catholic exorcist
    except...he dont touch little kids with physical intent
    just verbal instructions, like this is how you rap fluent

    i split a c,
    we got symmetry
    split a sea, I lead the people to greener pastures
    Rap demands this from the visionaries
    while those that never die, receive immortal laughter
    at the cost of their life, they to fall to gladiator slaughter

    like a natural disaster that barely missed
    I gave you a chance to recover wit
    instead you got worse when you called me a mouse...
    where was the damage inflicted..?
    On your walls in your house, you got mad when max tactically
    called you out

    your raps bended, when tay snapped your sentences
    anger management a therapist suggested

    but to your discretion your attending remained annonymous
    except being the mouse i was the shrink?
    Then told the whole forum of your identity

    elephant, ivory. teeth are too short to do any damage
    except to your own mouth, so you have an advantage
    when committing self mutilation for sympathetic glances

    you like fast food cuz its food served fast,
    skip the beverage, who needs code blue mnt dew
    when you have code blue in the hospital room
    shes on the last breath, maybe youll be the one to defib check
    as you shocked chest, you astounded doctors when you orgasmed
    from her near death experience

    cuz youre a medical student. You call it "experimenting"
    when cops are like kenny whatchu doing when youre caught
    fondling bodies not breatheing

    Jokes about fast food makes me wonder what facility your mental isnt in
    your bodys in an asylum.
    your conscious is outside on the run, cant catch him.

    shutter, cuz youre on a deserted island
    in your mind every things fine
    thats why you you sit outside suckin sunlight
    pretending to be a flower, man.
    but your just a weed needin' pullin'
    and im the obvious mexican to do it

    This launch is history, written by me
    the conqueror decides the story, and for that you gain no glory
    goodbye kenny your life is quite boring.
    Awake until late on an average morning,
    Up writing bars while the standard citizens snoring,
    Got a very busy lifestyle but that doesnt matter according,
    To my number 1 stalker, my jealous and bitter news reporter,
    Mentioned tactically calling me out, like i ain't the one who tested the water,
    I'm sorry Mr. Maximus but I have to report back to you, your daughter,
    She's not got long left, Wants to spend her last moments with you,
    Now maybe you get it and you're starting to see the ominous hue,
    She came in for a routine check, she's normally healthy, its true,
    But how much damage do you think a few litres of Co2 can possibly do?
    But theres a twist Max, you gave your daughter the gas mask,
    Cos i said I couldn't do it, ha man you fell right into my trap,
    You see your story,its true, the reason for the dead body is you,
    And your sobbing and your crying while slowly turning blue,
    You turn to me, gasp, beg, there must be some way to save her?
    I look at you grin, bare my teeth, i'm just sending her back to her maker,
    You're the one that made the allegations that i'm sick enough to r*pe her,
    I'm just following the instructions you wrote on that paper.

    You wake up, in a hospital bed, machines beeping away,
    You look outside, its dark, what the f*ck happened today?
    Think back, remember, suddenly you need to puke,
    Where's all your cockiness now, i thought that it was a fluke?
    On your side you can see a bowl of alphabet soup,
    The letters R I P hovering, you need no more proof,
    Run out the room, up the stairs, make your way to the roof,
    I'm there patiently waiting, cigar lit, offer one over to you to,
    Cos theres no point if I don't make fun out of everything that you do,
    You made your mind before you saw me, you're scared for your life,
    I'm smiling at you why does it feel like i've got a knife,
    To your throat, that poor little girl you used to dote, on,
    All that light and innocence, all thats left is a photon,
    You look back at that piece of paper you wrote on,
    Make a dash for the ledge, you jump, suddenly its all in slow motion,
    I was experimenting, you're the one who gave me the notion,
    The last thing you see before you die, is your daughters body following,
    falling from the sky.
    Last edited by KennyNeverDies; 05-14-2015 at 05:53 PM. Reason: Changing **** to f*ck

  8. #587
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    Default He ain't ready

    Kenny, attracting unwanted attention
    Penny in a bank, hes unwanted/unmentioned
    Yes i just addressed you, be grateful, your welcome
    Seldom, do I bother with a sordid cerebellum
    someone help him

    His form is wrecked
    Stuck in an 80's vortex
    Cant spit with his distorted cerebral cortex
    Spinal cord is contorted, his last resort is morbid
    Enormous tumor in his forehead
    I save the life of the wanna be doctor, where's my forceps?
    Don't forfeit, even after i exposed your self portrait,
    Just pretend like it ain't happen, life continues in orbit
    Was never awarded for his lack of importance
    So he resorted to fake stories of med school and extortion

    ..Suck a fat dik you intermediate wack b;tch
    The fact that I replied probably made your @ss clap and lift
    I retract all respect when body-bagging a snitch
    Bodies dragged in a ditch
    So many bodies half of them are jagged and itch
    If he never dies, then i just made sure at least half of him did
    The other half i wrap in a rap and take a drag of the spliff
    Catch me attackin' fast in a drift
    Max in the passenger askin your b;tch
    If she suck, swallow, or gags if its thick
    She picked all of the above, latching to the max of the tip
    Packin' her bags for a trip, take turns on her face rotate half of the shift

    Demoralize, your stories not fortified,
    broken down exposed so mortified
    What more can I, spit to
    bother destroying your self glorified
    Pursuit of an organized
    Suburban white lifestyle not fit, your mother is horrified
    wh0re did try, to enroll you in a good school
    But your mortal eyes, were condemned to a rejection letter, its formalized



    Targeting the Pros now? My shots steady
    Just Stick to dissin Pro-Found, your not ready

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    CrazyKydz (08-13-2015),taylormaximus (05-15-2015)

  10. #588
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    Template the last rap you did was off the hook it was sick. I'm glad somebody body bagged Kenny. Kenny G don't get me wrong you've been wreckin **** up too Mad respect for You guys and your work. And word to BackinBlack he inspired to me battle. I need to up my game if wanna hit with any these Pro's. Like I said though I'm not gonna quit untill I get dope.

  11. The Following User Says Thank You to Pro-Found For This Useful Post:
    Template (05-15-2015)

  12. #589
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    Can I ask y'all for some feedback?

    Everyone seems to be inspired by bnb. I personally was motivated to start battling by SBU and smoothtung

  13. #590
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    Quote Originally Posted by Template View Post
    Kenny, attracting unwanted attention
    Penny in a bank, hes unwanted/unmentioned
    Yes i just addressed you, be grateful, your welcome
    Seldom, do I bother with a sordid cerebellum
    someone help him

    His form is wrecked
    Stuck in an 80's vortex
    Cant spit with his distorted cerebral cortex
    Spinal cord is contorted, his last resort is morbid
    Enormous tumor in his forehead
    I save the life of the wanna be doctor, where's my forceps?
    Don't forfeit, even after i exposed your self portrait,
    Just pretend like it ain't happen, life continues in orbit
    Was never awarded for his lack of importance
    So he resorted to fake stories of med school and extortion

    ..Suck a fat dik you intermediate wack b;tch
    The fact that I replied probably made your @ss clap and lift
    I retract all respect when body-bagging a snitch
    Bodies dragged in a ditch
    So many bodies half of them are jagged and itch
    If he never dies, then i just made sure at least half of him did
    The other half i wrap in a rap and take a drag of the spliff
    Catch me attackin' fast in a drift
    Max in the passenger askin your b;tch
    If she suck, swallow, or gags if its thick
    She picked all of the above, latching to the max of the tip
    Packin' her bags for a trip, take turns on her face rotate half of the shift

    Demoralize, your stories not fortified,
    broken down exposed so mortified
    What more can I, spit to
    bother destroying your self glorified
    Pursuit of an organized
    Suburban white lifestyle not fit, your mother is horrified
    wh0re did try, to enroll you in a good school
    But your mortal eyes, were condemned to a rejection letter, its formalized



    Targeting the Pros now? My shots steady
    Just Stick to dissin Pro-Found, your not ready
    You lot ain't come close to the truth, Not tryna be a preacher,
    Battling skills adapt based on my opponent, my main feature,
    A medical student, turned to a battle rap teacher,
    Adapting lesson plans, so I'm better suited to school you,
    Contorting your limbs, vocal cords, this is straight voodoo,
    I ain't targeting the pros, I'm just listing the pros,
    And cons of this community that i'm gonna expose.
    The fact that i never die, should keep you on your toes,
    Cos you might think you've went and put me in a camatose,
    state, but wait, the bodies making movements,
    I'll never give up on my students,
    Cos you ain't anywhere near close to making music,
    This is a difficult issue, i need to think before i introduce it,
    None of you others fit the template, so i dont think i can use it,
    anymore, it's just not worth it, not worth the time,
    I could get a better reaction from snorting phenylalanine,
    You talk about all these bodies, well i'm gonna canabalise,
    chop them up, cook at 220 Celcius, eat, then metabolise,
    Your bars are a pack of lies,
    I spit the maddest rhymes,
    Keep my flow switching like i'm reacting to the alkaline,
    You get it cos you're salty,
    Cos of the fact that you aren't me,
    You think you could take me one and one, when you couldn't with an army,
    400 AK-47s 6 German Shephards and even an RV,
    Give you that **** and you still couldn't harm me,
    You could disarm me, have a blade at my neck,
    But you wouldn't dare touch me, i dont have to pay for respect,
    If you killed me you'd be a crook for life, your name in the books,
    So you'd half-kill me but we all know that THERE AINT NO SUCH THING AS HALFWAY CROOKS.

    Pro-found, i'll find a self proclaimed pro found,
    Lying dead in the middle of an Afghan compound,
    With pictures of template and samples of cum found,
    Talk about bodybags when i've been on my toes, spitting fire for 10 rounds,
    I'm gonna have posters of you made and then sent out,
    Hitmen on the job, give me a text when they enroute,
    See the damage i can do when i get to pulling my pad and pen out?

    This to any battler thinking they in my league,
    I'm not just loud and cocky, im no prince naseem,
    I got the kinda bars that make other battlers seem,
    Like they're tearing their threads out, got them ripped at the seam,
    I aint no martin luther, but that dont mean i cant have a dream,
    My dream is simple, using this as a platform to improve,
    Recording a few tracks for clubs and a few to induce,
    Emotions into my listeners, so that they then can view,
    the world in a different light, when they feel like they've lost that fight,
    Inside, it's internal, and I know it feels eternal,
    Sometimes you need an angel, but other times you feel infernal,
    I wanna be the artist an average man can turn to,
    But still have that defence, other rappers can't burn through,
    I wanna be impeccable, make my bars as unforgettable,
    As possible, Have a positive impact, want them to be seen as medical,
    Don't wanna be placed on a pedicle,
    That I didn't earn,
    So i'm using this as a conference, cos even teachers gotta learn.

  14. #591
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    @Tmax
    Well I admit too that _S is the reason I jumped in, but BnB was the first to tear it up. You can subliminally hear him begging for a challenger of his caliber to show up and that's when 'Mack and _S came.
    @Profound, humble words you said there man, I like that. It shows signs of future improvement.

    Advice for Kenny(since your last line says you wanna learn): Try thinking of crafty but direct punches, instead of rambling off topic most of your lines. Then with more practice incorporate double meaning wordplay, creative multi's, and develop an intricate style. Even though we all know you got body bagged, keep your chin up, you might get there.

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    For all you forum users with advice, id appreciate some feedback. What do I need to touch on to get better? Opinions-especially critical-are most welcome!

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    Definitely need to work on my multis, they've slowly started improving in my more recent ones. Maybe i'm overrating my bars, but I thought mine were very polished, and each verse had a theme (which is what I notice top battlers do?) The rambling, is me building up a scene within the verse, which is a style i prefer (as loads do) to just unrelated punchlines? I definitely need to use more direct punches in aswell, but definitely don't think getting rid of the entire storytelling side is a good idea. Want some other users opinions maybe? I definitely don't think i was 'bodybagged' at all haha but then again could just be me overrating my bars (like loads of people do).

    Taylor you've had some really witty lines i've liked but I feel like you ramble a lot? Just pointless punchlines that don't seem to naturally flow together? Idk i quite like battlers who battle with schemes in their rounds. Also some of your punchlines are fairly weak, which doesn't help. Not trying to be too negative here tho I've seen some really good bars from you. Also, i really prefer some of your old stuff now that i've looked back at it

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    you sythicize and reacap
    Just to intensify your weak rap

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    sorry KEnny!!! i Menat to post this on another thread! You're rhymes are pretty dope! keep fllowing Hommie

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    Haha thanks man

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    Kenny Kenny... What's it gonna take for you to understand,
    I'll have your soul in my left palm and your pride in the otherhand,

    If you want a challenge, Reply
    Haha.

  22. #598
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    Quote Originally Posted by JesusFreak23 View Post
    Kenny Kenny... What's it gonna take for you to understand,
    I'll have your soul in my left palm and your pride in the otherhand,

    If you want a challenge, Reply
    Haha.
    I find it offensive, that you think you can battle with me,
    Instead of getting on Noahs Ark and riding out to sea,
    I don't believe in you, That means i'm a heathen, a fiend,
    I'm the closest thing to Satan that you've ever seen.
    Don't try calling me out with a couplet,
    Your virgin mothers breast, i wanna suckle it,
    I want the holy spirit involved, whipped cream and some chocolate,
    You tryna rhyme? Well I needed a chuckle kid.
    Rap groups notorious? What a ripoff of a legend resting in the hall of fame,
    You're tryna be the same, a lot can be said with a name,
    You're missing the BIG cos you'll never be big in the game.
    Take my soul? B1tch you need to get your own,
    How you gonna give yourself to an imaginary friend, just so you won't be alone?
    Don't ever try to **** with me, this sh1t isnt a democracy,
    You even rapping with that name is a ****ing mockery,
    Christian morals? Thou Shalt not steal and kill,
    Nor should thy feel as if they need to prove thy skill,
    God works in mysterious ways, being vain is a sin,
    So don't tell me you're the best or you'll have to answer to him.

  23. #599
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    I got my broom
    Check
    I got my pad and pen
    Check
    Hey you know what? I'm high as fuk right now... no... seriously I am
    And I'm a just see what happens...

    When I go to slappin....

    I'm slappin' and rappin'

    24 bars at large....

    Here we go... Ha! HA! HA!

    I'll slap ya lips off
    I'll slap ya clothes backwards like Kriss Kross
    So p1$$ off and get lost
    Cain't you see I'm jackin' my d1ck off? Hang around and get some lip gloss
    I went to college but all I learned was slappin' b1tches major
    So please don't make me activate a slap and active hater
    While I slap 'em I'm a rappin' captivator
    You can call me Captain Aggravator
    Wit a passion for grabbin' at the paper and I'll slap a traitor
    Till my hand blisters
    Slap you, ya brothers and sisters
    I slap clam fishers
    Even though I am one that's dam vicious
    Coz I'll fuk a pregnant b1ches sweetest spot til the fetus pops
    Then slap her venus box until she finishes the penis off
    I'll slap your Adidas off
    And keep slappin' till ya breathin' stops
    I'm slap happy
    I'll slap pappy
    If he act crappy and try to slap me
    I'm sure y'all know how that be
    Nobody's leavin' slap free and if they don't see great
    I'm a slap each face until they can't see straight
    I slap hoes that make me wait
    But most of all I slap muthafukkas that didn't have a V8

    Wait....
    Naw that last sh1t was wack
    I told y'all I'm high

    Let me try again here

    My words are like timebombs
    I'm explosive on any track I rhyme on
    And then I'm gone
    About to get my high on
    High as Zion and when I come back y'all can lick the frost off my boots
    Coz I'll smash any dam one y'all in the booth and that's the gospel truth
    I come from hostile roots
    And I don't even need to cobble proof like you aint gotta wonder if a cop'll shoot
    We were hostile youth and we didn't give a fuk
    I still don't in most ways I just had to switch it up
    I know what's pure and I know which is cut
    And I know how to cut these fishes guts
    So soon I'm a finish up and leave y'all in the aftermath
    I'm kinda anxious to see what y'all gonna do after that
    I limbered this b1tch up like an acrobat
    So y'all can go ahead and have it back

  24. #600
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    Quote Originally Posted by BackInBlack View Post
    I got my broom
    Check
    I got my pad and pen
    Check
    Hey you know what? I'm high as fuk right now... no... seriously I am
    And I'm a just see what happens...

    When I go to slappin....

    I'm slappin' and rappin'

    24 bars at large....

    Here we go... Ha! HA! HA!

    I'll slap ya lips off
    I'll slap ya clothes backwards like Kriss Kross
    So p1$$ off and get lost
    Cain't you see I'm jackin' my d1ck off? Hang around and get some lip gloss
    I went to college but all I learned was slappin' b1tches major
    So please don't make me activate a slap and active hater
    While I slap 'em I'm a rappin' captivator
    You can call me Captain Aggravator
    Wit a passion for grabbin' at the paper and I'll slap a traitor
    Till my hand blisters
    Slap you, ya brothers and sisters
    I slap clam fishers
    Even though I am one that's dam vicious
    Coz I'll fuk a pregnant b1ches sweetest spot til the fetus pops
    Then slap her venus box until she finishes the penis off
    I'll slap your Adidas off
    And keep slappin' till ya breathin' stops
    I'm slap happy
    I'll slap pappy
    If he act crappy and try to slap me
    I'm sure y'all know how that be
    Nobody's leavin' slap free and if they don't see great
    I'm a slap each face until they can't see straight
    I slap hoes that make me wait
    But most of all I slap muthafukkas that didn't have a V8

    Wait....
    Naw that last sh1t was wack
    I told y'all I'm high

    Let me try again here

    My words are like timebombs
    I'm explosive on any track I rhyme on
    And then I'm gone
    About to get my high on
    High as Zion and when I come back y'all can lick the frost off my boots
    Coz I'll smash any dam one y'all in the booth and that's the gospel truth
    I come from hostile roots
    And I don't even need to cobble proof like you aint gotta wonder if a cop'll shoot
    We were hostile youth and we didn't give a fuk
    I still don't in most ways I just had to switch it up
    I know what's pure and I know which is cut
    And I know how to cut these fishes guts
    So soon I'm a finish up and leave y'all in the aftermath
    I'm kinda anxious to see what y'all gonna do after that
    I limbered this b1tch up like an acrobat
    So y'all can go ahead and have it back
    Remember them days when BackInBlack brought doom,
    Instead of catching bodies, the fans caught tombs,
    But after a while, he's started to get old, like any good cartoon,
    Stole uranium from the government, made the planet go KABOOM,
    Give it back Malfoy or i'll knock off your broom,
    I needed some of that ****, if i wanted to be able to compete on this level,
    My opponents cardiac output had to double,
    They needed that liquid courage in the form of a treble,
    And even then they'd be another stone tossed among the pebbles,
    Not quite polished enough, they lacking the spark, the ambition,
    The skillset to slaughter, quickly, painfully and with precision,
    I can't envision a competitor, that could truthfully kill me,
    You casual rappers miss so many punchlines, thats why you dont feel me,
    You don't see the ****ing work that goes in every scheme,
    Wait a sec Bnb is captain aggravator?
    **** you can call me Lieutenant General or Major,
    I'll take your family and friends, send-em-all ta Maya,
    Offer them as a sacrifice, push em straight in the fire,
    You don't understand how this situation got so dire,
    You're just the average stoner, tryna get a lil higher,
    Can't throw stones at others, unless you aint a liar,
    stealer, pill junkie, wife beater,
    After 6 shots of tequila,
    Got that courage finally building up you're going to-kill-her.

    Three of my verses on here, i wrote while i was high,
    I didn't have to point it out, I kept the quality high,
    You used it as an excuse to leave out all those multi rhymes,
    I want real competiton, JesusFreak23,
    Doesn't cut it for me,
    I know i ****ing said that i would battle for free,
    But I still want the top of the chain, I want that Adam and Eve,
    Not some wannabe Monster template, who's adamant he's,
    miles ahead of the rest, little ****boys just getting ahead of himself.

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