Rock bottom

Rock bottom

How far can I fall I wonder
As I step closer & peer over the edge
How close am I to rock bottom
I'm no naive victim in this
I'm aware of every step & the direction
However fast or slow my pace

Chorus
Rock bottom, can't be too far now
Rock bottom, my own private hell

I know I have options
With effort a brighter future could be mine
But that knowledge instead of bringing comfort
Adds to the heaviness inside, GUILT!
Because 'I know better'

A deep yearning for ignorence
Oh to believe my descent into darkness is beyond my control
Someone or something else to blame
For my path of self destruction

Chorus
Rock bottom, can't be too far now
Rock bottom, my own private hell
Rock bottom, I gotta own it, its mine
Rock bottom, I'm running outta time

I hate that I know the way out
I can see in the distance a glimmer of hope
That twinkle promising brighter tomorrows that could be mine
It makes me hate myself that I wish
There was no light at the end of the tunnel

Chorus
Rock bottom, can't be too far now
Rock bottom, my own private hell
Rock bottom, I'm on your steep path
Rock bottom, Il find my way stumbling in the dark

I can't ask for help because I'm so scared I might get it
I'm terrified of what might happen or who I may become
How else & how much more can I punish my soul
Denying my right to feel or remember

It's a race to the bottom in all its despair & gloom
I just hope its not too faraway
I need to be there so bad
Only then at my lowest of lows
When there is no place left to fall from or anything left to lose
Will I find peace

Chorus
Rock bottom, can't be too far now
Rock bottom, my own private hell
Rock bottom, emotions on the shelf
Rock bottom, please save me from myself

Nice, very nice. I can see the emotion in this. I do think (imo) that it would help to keep the chorus's at least the same length or at the same syllable count so the musician doesn't have to work as hard. Having said that, you may have music for it that works, that I don't see. It's hard to see what's in a lyricists head. But I really like this and think with a little "tweaking" you can make it soar better. Good write and good read. Thanks for sharing.