First Legit "Song" want feedback

Say something now its crazy
I been wasting my life im lazy
I aint gunna lie
You can say ima try
But the old me has gone bye bye
Im breaking down, im gunna cry
Well, I guess we learn with time
If time is money, im wasting dimes
-Chorus-
Just like this song
My life is all wrong
Lucky i get, to last that long-
Verse 2
Round 2
Still in this ring
I know im not there yet but ima be king
My potential was wasted
But it has been tasted
Im not that good, but ive never copied and pasted
Oh well,
Aw h***
So personal im sick and pale
-Back to Chorus-
Verse 3
Right quick
Before i go
Ima tell you what you should know
Lifes battles are rough
But I am still tough
But am I enough?
Questionably
But overally , whats in it for me?

Just like this song
My life is all wrong

Best part

Haa, yeah, it really sucks though

Nah man everyone starts somewhere, the only reason I keep rapping is because I HAVE seen improvement from since I've started, I'm trying to work my way up to SBU's level lol. Read his lyrics, and other good rappers, to understand what they are trying to convey to you and how they deliver it. Puns, metaphors, similes, different styles of flow, it's all important. I try to think of things that would make people go like "damn! that line was crazy, and it didn't break flow!" Ya know? Like Rhyme Asylum, great example.. Poison Penmanship: "I was breastfed bottles of arsenic" ****ing crazy line right? In a battle on here I went from stuff like:
"You come up on my turf looking like you tough
you a fake a** gangsta boy, you ain't rough
I'll say to yo face, and put you down on the ground
Boy f**k making you a bi***, you'll be my hound
To just stuff off the top of my head like:

You wanna go some rounds then I'll take ya to five,
All around blood-thirsty like a vampenize parasite,
Dead inside, got cancer stage 5 and iller rhymes,
Been high but I have seen taller times breakin lines.."

work on syllable count, like each syllable count in at least a couple lines should be close to the same, don't want like 7 syllables and then 24 the next line. You'll get better man, don't be negative about it.

Hey tyler, if your looking for a more competetive site, google lyrical assault, im DjFlame on there, look me up