When I try to try

I try my best to get my thoughts on this paper
but it always sounds improper like hanged or escaper
I'm my biggest critic and I really hate it
No matter what I write, I hate this ****
It's never good, it's never tight
It never flows just quite right
I get no respect from the typewriter
Tap, tap, tapping in my mind at night
I spend hours staring at a blank page
Then rethink if I really want this lane
I want the fame, I want them to know my name
but I do this because I need the release more
And it seems like I always come back for more
I write and stop and start again like it's a fun chore
It's my drug, I'm addicted
And it's never really as bad as it seems
I mean, I love it but I hate it too
I try my best to explain it to you
This love-hate relationship with rap and I
But the harder it becomes, the less I seem to try

I love it, I dont know how many times ive been through that self questioning myself

I as a musician and songwriter tell you this:

blanco paper, frustrating hours, days, weeks you can't get anything done: never mind!
It's all a matter of relax and wait.
It will come out then.
If it doesnot at all, just do something else
Believe me.
People who want to be famous there are scores and scores.
Those who succeed are the happy few.
Don't give up yet.