A little something

This is one the lyrics I've used the most time on
but it still feels unfinished somehow, is it just me or is it something lacking?


You are hiding
Rose in the bushes
Thorns and lies
Rose in darkness
Hidden from you
Red-stained rose

Beautiful hate
Rose-red manifestation
See the flesh
Red as the rose in color
Crying for you
Rose in the bushes

Dreams bow down
Rip apart reality
Simple lies grow
Roses rain from the sky
Ground shaking
Rose hidden in dark mist

Take this sign of undying love
Falling roses caressing your body
Thorns of love is raining down
Obsession beyond any belief
No god will forgive the sin of love
Giving in to the divine extortion

No more love
To break me
Just leave it
To die away

Alone love dies
Rolling thunder in the heart
Drugged up
Relaxed, death will come
Tied down
Red roses fall to the ground

Feel the sound
Reminding you of love
Hear the music
Resounding in your mind
Haunted by past life
Roses waving in the wind

Spoken truth is pain
Red fires within your heart
Pain overwhelming
Rose with thorns
Crying angels
Rendering us thoughtless

Interesting. One part that is slightly confusing to me is in the 4th verse,

"Take this sign of undying love
Falling roses caressing your body
Leaves of love is raining down
Obsession beyond any belief
No god will forgive the sin of love
Giving in to the divine extortion"

The verses before this depict a more negative vibe about love, or at least the love that you are feeling. So the line "take this sign of undying love" kinda seems out of place to me. Also, I almost feel like you could split this verse in half and make two out of it. But it's your art, your choice. My last suggestion; If you choose to keep this verse as it is, I think the line "leaves of love is raining down" should be "thorns of love are raining down." I think this matches your overall theme better. Just my thoughts

Actually I made that verse (it isn't really a verse, either) different on purpose, but I can see how it might be a bit confusing. I agree on the part of changing leaves with thorns, so I will change that.

Thanks, the changes will be done immediately