a chorus, any ideas for verses?

Thread: a chorus, any ideas for verses?

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  1. Tracy-Turnblad's Avatar

    Tracy-Turnblad said:

    Default a chorus, any ideas for verses?

    Chorus:
    The future's unwritten
    words unspoken
    Things could change iin just a day
    Unwritten
    I've still got time left to say
    Those things I didn't yesterday

    The song's kind of saying that even tough you've messed up, you haven't said somthing that you needed to say, or you're getting nowhere, anything could happen in the future and it isn't written. You've got time to turn things around, you can say what you want, and you can change things, so there's no point worrying about what's already happened and regreting things when you can decide what happens tomorrow.
     
  2. bryan2037 said:

    Default

    Oppurtunity comes knocking, Knocking at my door
    The sound that drives me, The sound I live for
    Anything could happen, Happen to the best
    I can change anything, Better than the rest

    The future's unwritten
    words unspoken
    Things could change iin just a day
    Unwritten
    I've still got time left to say
    Those things I didn't yesterday

    What's in store tomorrow, won't be decided today
    I won't think about it, I'll just turn and run away
    But running and running, Won't do me any good
    I've got to turn and face it, Today I should

    The future's unwritten
    words unspoken
    Things could change iin just a day
    Unwritten
    I've still got time left to say
    Those things I didn't yesterday

    I've got time to turn it around
    I've got time to rebound
    I can't live with the pain of regret
    Or try and live and just forget
    Everything that never went my way
    Everything that I just didn't say
    Everything that I did lack
    I'll Just right the ship right on track

    The future's unwritten
    words unspoken
    Things could change iin just a day
    Unwritten
    I've still got time left to say
    Those things I didn't yesterday




    I'm not sure what you'll think. I gave it a shot seeing as no one else would. What do you think?

    -Bryan
     
  3. texter-bernd said:

    Default

    I like the chorus! In the verses I would NOT repeat or recycle the idea of the chorus but tell part of a story which has lead to 'my' new insight. E.g. in verse one: I took things (your friendship etc.) for granted, pursued my own interests, lived my own life, and relied on 'you' just being there for me. Verse two: you have left me, and I realize that 'I' am the one to blame.
    (I assume the unsaid words being a spontaneous 'I love you')

    I don't know the meter of the song, so there's no use trying to produce 'perfect' rhymes or so.

    Cheers,
    Bernd
     
  4. Tracy-Turnblad's Avatar

    Tracy-Turnblad said:

    Default

    bryan2037's is good, but I think it needs more of a story, thanks for the help, and i've changed the chorus so it fitsbetter with the music, here it is:
    The future's unwritten
    words unspoken
    Things could change today
    Unwritten
    Not been chosen
    I've still got time left to say
    Those things I didn't yesterday