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  1. #1

    Default Rap about A girl that is driving me crazy (my first rap)

    I wrote this when a girl was messing me around, every thing in this is true
    please give me any feedback. (I dont have a hook for it, any ideas?)

    Im on top of the world and Im feeling great
    Your the only reason im feelin straight
    I know already, I wanna like you
    we flirt, we talk, we text till 2
    "dont fall hard, you'll only regret it"
    "oh no problem, dont you sweat it"
    Your standing there in your clique
    I just want to kiss you on your cheek,
    But your friends would stare, and give me a glare
    I can sense they dont want me there,
    "who is this boy, whos stealing our joy?"

    I recall a spider within your humble abode
    I should have gone, I could have rode
    you wanted me there, to run my fingers through your hair
    and tell you its alright, because theres nothing to fright
    But I didnt come, I stayed home like a bum
    It would have been fun, what we could of done
    But it was okay, saved for another day

    Then you vanished, you were gone for a week,
    we didnt chill, we didnt text, we didnt speak.
    I began to worry, the thoughts started to scurry
    what if she's mad? what if shes sad?
    what if she has grown a sudden detest?
    and for a week I couldnt rest.
    I couldnt sleep, I couldnt eat, I just felt incomplete.

    And then you returned, with good news galore
    you were grounded and you didnt ignore.
    I was relieved,
    but you had decieved
    you told me you liked me
    and this totally phsyched me.
    you gave me desire
    that I couldnt aquire

    "I dont know how to say this, but theres another guy"
    so its all been a lie!
    anger flowing through my veins
    the clouds cover and it starts to rain,
    the drops of sadness pound above my hall
    as I clench my fist and begin to crawl
    the music is pumping, and my heart is thumping
    I yell and scream, to blow off some steam
    my fist still clenched, my clothes are drenched
    my nausious stomach is being ripped and wrenched
    madness and sadness mix and mingle, oh how I hate being single
    my delirious mind leaves me furious,
    how she can be so spurious,
    I thrust the ball of flesh on the end of my arm
    it strikes the wall but does no harm,
    I swing again,
    it echoes the den,
    I feel my knuckles penetrate the membrane
    I must refrane from striking again,
    but my fist keeps moving, I dont know what im proving,
    I just keep punching, my knuckles are crunching

    the rage simmers my blood as I lay on my bed depleted
    a tear rolls down my cheek and I feel defeated,
    I need some air,
    this isnt fair.
    one in the morning I leave my house
    sneaking out as quiet as a mouse
    no shirt no shoes,
    no need to snooze
    I begin to sprint, and sprint I did
    I just ran and ran and then I hid,
    fatigue to the point of illness,
    laying on the road in utter stillness
    spending my time squandering and pondering
    over the girl that kept my mind wandering.

    Look at me now, I was on top of the world
    but things got swirled, twisted, and twirled.
    theres one thing to keep in mind
    S*** happens, and love is blind.

  2. #2

    Hey instead of
    "Im on top of the world and Im feeling great"
    say im on top of the world and im feelin' no hate.
    and for the next line say
    "your're the only reason that im feeling so great.

  3. #3
    shanky D'cruz

    Hey eahowden ! nice rap there.. m using it for my song. ill post the link as soon as its recorded .. thanks

  4. #4
    Junior Member AJMcCabe94's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    that was tight bro can you help me with my rap to a girl that i really love

  5. The Following User Says Thank You to AJMcCabe94 For This Useful Post:
    SalvadorB (11-12-2017)

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