FIN->ENG Sydänpuu - Suojassa

So here's another request from me: Suojassa by Sydänpuu I have tried to translate it by myself because it's a nice way of learning the language but I'd love to hear your opinion on what's correct and what I hadn't got right.

Suojassa

Kaupungin yössä suudeltiin
Sen hiljaisuutta kuunneltiin
Puun alla puistossa värjöteltiin
Ei paikkaa, ei aikaa
Huominen arvet aukaisee
Aamu ristiinnaulitsee
Kumpa yömme olis ikuisuus

Kun toivoo hetken kestävän
Vain ajan huomaa lentävän

Puun alla suojassa, lämmität mua
Yö kylmä, sylisi lämmin
Vain lehdet peittona, lämmitän sua
Todellisuus avaa silmät surulliset

Linnut aamun aloittaa
Tahtoisin maailman unohtaa
Antaa tuulen vaan kuljettaa
Meidät kauas pois
Sun hymysi hohtaa
Ihollasi sade loistaa
Mutta tiedän mä sen, mitä tarvitsen
Kohti loppua raksuttaa

Aika muuttuu, mutta haaveet ei
Mä haluun luokse sen, joka sydämeni vei

Puun alla suojassa, lämmität mua
Yö kylmä, sylisi lämmin
Vain lehdet peittona, lämmitän sua
Todellisuus avaa silmät surulliset

Sua rakastan, sulle antaudun
Käsivarsillesi rantaudun,
Ota vastaan älä pudota, unohda, kosketa, mua katseellasi satuta,
Lävistä, minut katkaise, siipeni, herätä, tai sammuta liekkini,
Sulata, minun miekkani, kilpeni, hautaa minut tänään tänään

Puun alla suojassa, lämmität mua
Yö kylmä, sylisi lämmin
Vain lehdet peittona, lämmitän sua
Todellisuus avaa silmät surulliset


And here's my translation:


In the shelter

Kissed on a city night
Listened to its silence
Shivered under a tree in a park
No place, no time
Scars of tomorrow split open
The morning crucifies
If only our night was eternal

When hopes for a moment of endurance
Only to find the time fly

In the shelter under the tree, to warm myself
Night cold, your lap warm
Only a blanket of leaves, I warm you
Reality opens mournful eyes

Morning birds start
I would like to forget the world
Give the wind but carry
Us far away
Your smile shines
Rain glows your skin
But I know what I need
Ticking towards the end

Time changes but the dreams don’t
I want to join what took my heart

In the shelter under the tree, to warm myself
Night cold, your lap warm
Only a blanket of leaves, I warm you
Reality opens mournful eyes

I love you, I surrender to you
I moor myself into your arms
Accept do not let slip, forget it, touch, your gaze hurts me,
Puncture, cut me, my wings, wake up, or put out my flame,
Melt, my sword, my shield, bury me today today

In the shelter under the tree, to warm myself
Night cold, your lap warm
Only a blanket of leaves, I warm you
Reality opens mournful eyes

Originally Posted by sankari

In the shelter

Kissed on a city night
Listened to its silence
Shivered under a tree in a park
No place, no time
tomorrow opens the scars
The morning crucifies
If only our night was eternal

When you hope for the moment to last
Only to find the time fly

In the shelter under the tree, you warm me
Night cold, your lap warm
Only a blanket of leaves*, I warm you
Reality opens mournful eyes

Birds start the morning
I would like to forget the world
to only let the wind carry
Us far away
Your smile shines
Rain glows on your skin
But I know what I need
Ticking towards the end

Time changes but the dreams don’t
I want to join what took my heart

In the shelter under the tree, you warm me
Night cold, your lap warm
Only a blanket of leaves*, I warm you
Reality opens mournful eyes

I love you, I surrender to you
I moor myself into your arms
Accept do not let slip, forget it, touch, hurt me with your glaze,
Puncture, cut me, my wings, wake up, or put out my flame,
Melt, my sword, my shield, bury me today today

In the shelter under the tree, you warm me
Night cold, your lap warm
Only a blanket of leaves*, I warm you
Reality opens mournful eyes

* Only a blanket of leaves ;

Vain lehdet peittona, i'd translate it 'Only leaves as my blanket', but i think that works too