english - turkish please

[cameronparkhurst]

hmmm not sure if i would use truly madly deeply-but its your wedding...how about some harry connick jr. elegant, refined, romantic...

what i have noticed from hearing story after story is 2 things 1.most turk men use foreign women. 2. the ones that dont use foreign women have huge issues with the family and i am not sure if its the men using "family" as a reason to dissolve the relationship or if its real. that being said: many turks have a very closed mind toward foreigners being part of their families. the cultural differences are difficult for them to accept. and truly what a shame. this is something so strange for me, an american, where my country is made up of all nations. we dont think of those differences. and we accept them--we dont follow them but we accept them. jews marry muslims, christans, buddhists...russians marry chinese etc...and we mesh it together. we take some traditions from one and some traditions for another. neither person has to change religion or anything. we sort of learn to work together.
further, we dont have any say in who our children marry. why should we? we dont have to live with them everyday. no one has the right to comment on a person's relationship. its not their business. and to not accept someone into the family?? people should be ashamed of themselves for treating others so badly.

hi before anyone puts their remarks id like to speak for myself.
Im not angry with selcuk for what he wrote we had many ups and downs in our relationship and many problems. Yes i cried alot when reading this its very hurtful but i give him a right because i did hurt him too. I didnt cheat but we did split up numerous times and i did date others in those times we were nt together but in turkish culture its seen as cheating. The emotional blackmail used here is unfair and unnecessary but i understand he is hurting coz we did love each other alot.
But from my point when you have 4 children and one who is autistic you need a stable man a reliable man a committed man because for the last 3 years ive been living alone with the 4 children and have had no help from family or friends. Yeh people can call me names but id like to see them do what i have done. Infact last 2 years my children have won cups at school for their behaviour and work something that makes me proud but more special than that my autistic son won an award for his artwork because he has a gift in that area.
Would any of you risk your kids house and future on someone manipulative and immature emotionally? I think not.

Anyway i still believe inter racial relationships can work well i love turkish people and always will there are many differences in attitudes and in any family in any culture they are all individual. Whether its a turkish family english family or whatever, and in the past i was treated extremely well by turkish familys this was just one experience.

One thing i do want to touch on to other women who ve written about their relationships on this site, just be careful who you get mixed up with and ask yourself is this man too jealous is he manipulative is his mind open or closed, how is his family and that goes for who ever you are with..........the english man i was with was all these things too!!!

so lets not generalise about any particular nation we all have good and bad things in our culture.

Selcuk i forgive you and i undestand why you wrote this i wish you peace and happiness in your future and for my old adversery your anne

Its the end of ramadan today so happy bayram to all the muslims here .....
Peace and love joanne xxxxx

[selcukx55]

peace be upon you. peace be upon your kids. peace be upon ur cats n birds

[cameronparkhurst]

i wasnt going to comment but since i am the american who speaks freely i have a few things to say...

selcuk-what you posted can only be described as immature and an incredibly distasteful display. i dont know either of you. but your character is in serious need of an overhaul. and you are very hurt. if you were not hurt-you would have never wrote that disgusting , vengeful post.

You cant make someone jealous-ever. You are responsible for your own feelings and you dont blame others for making you feel a certain way. Jealousy is NOT a sign of love. it is a sign of control and a fear of losing. Jealousy usually stems from your own insecurities and low self-esteem. Address these issues. Jealousy disappears when you are truly loving yourself and others for whatever experience you’re having.

cheating is when you are exclusively dating each other and someone has a sexual relationship without the other persons knowledge. if you are broken up but still talking..thats NOT cheating. That being said if you are actively working on your relationship to try to make it better..its best to not date others.

raising children is hard work whether you have 1 or 20. i have a beautiful son. i do it on my own. its my child and i took that responsibility when i had him. i dont expect help from anyone-its not their responsibility. with that responsibility there are certain behaviors that should be done by the parent. going out and getting drunk and/or having one night stands is not one of them---ever!! that isnt a stable home. a parent who does this is a parent who wants their youth and no responsibilities back.

rule of thumb if you have children and are dating. the children do not meet or learn of the person you are dating until 1 years has passed and you and your partner are still exclusively together.

blackmail is when you threaten someone that you will do something if they dont do what you ask--this is not blackmail..emotional or otherwise

turk-american, turk-european is not inter racial---its cultural...turks are the same race as europeans--caucasians asian, caucasian, blacks--thats race

as for autism-there are many new therapies coming out-you may want to look into them

that will be $500 for this session

[moniquek]

[quote=cameronparkhurst;427945no one has the right to comment on a person's relationship. its not their business. and to not accept someone into the family?? people should be ashamed of themselves for treating others so badly.[/QUOTE]

exactly right, someone here went as far as saying that a Muslim who marries a non-Muslim is a sinner, not sure why this person is on a multi-cultural forum & ironically using a Spanish username, it is her/his business to think whatever this person likes privately, but to voice such comment on a public forum was in poor taste to say the least. I guess it is difficult for some to think for themselves and much easier to do what they have been told or taught to do generation after generation.

[selcukx55]

..........

[cameronparkhurst]

americans ignorant?? 1. name calling is rude, and immature--2. hehehehe.okay we are the most powerful and advanced country in the world--hardly ignorant. being that we always save the british and everyone else from people who try to take away peoples basic freedoms and then give billions of dollars to sooo many countries-please-give me a break

if you are going to showcase your life in the most immature vengeful way--you are going to get a response. your post was incredibly gross and immature. i dont have to know anything about the relationship--and i dont want to--you invited anyone when you posted!

"to reproach after being badly hurt can not be a blackmail." no cause the word "blackmail" is not the right word-its vengeful and a very wrong thing to do!! and yes you are still hurt otherwise you would have never posted...

jealousy is very bad--take some psychology and sociology classes and learn about human behavior and right and wrong. turkey has a huge problem with domestic violence as many men in turkey try to control their gfs and wives. this is NOT healthy or acceptable. and your behavior is not healthy or acceptable. your feelings are your OWN!! you cant MAKE someone feel jealous or any other feeling. other peoples actions are their own--how you respond to them are your own. the only person you can control is yourself.

if you are broken up but still talking-its not cheating!!!!!!!!!!!!! cheating is when you are in an exclusive relationship and one or both seek outside the relationship. if you are broken-up--you are NOT together!!!!

a yankee is not any american--its an american who is from "NEW ENGLAND" WHICH IS MADE UP OF THESE STATES: MAINE, NEW HAMPSHIRE, VERMONT, MASSACHUSETTS, CONNECTICUT, AND RHODE ISLAND ONLY!!
i am so done with this...

[selcukx55]

Originally Posted by cameronparkhurst

americans ignorant--hehehehe.okay we are the most powerful and advanced country in the world--hardly ignorant. being that we always save the british and everyone else from people who try to take away peoples basic freedoms and then give billions of dollars to sooo many countries-please-give me a break

if you are going to showcase your life in the most immature vengeful way--you are going to get a response. your post was incredibly gross and immature. i dont have to know anything about the relationship--and i dont want to--you invited anyone when you posted!

"to reproach after being badly hurt ca not be a blackmail." no-its vengeful and very wrong thing to do!! and yes you are still hurt otherwose you would have never posted...

jealousy is very bad--take some psychology and sociology classes and learn about human behavior and right and wrong. turkey has a huge problem with domestic violence as many men in turkey try to control their gfs and wives. this is NOT healthy or acceptable. and your behavior is not healthy or acceptable. your feelings are your OWN!! you cant MAKE someone feel jealous or any other feeling. other peoples actions are their own--how you respond to them are your own. the only person you can control is yourself.

if you are broken up but still talking-its not cheating!!!!!!!!!!!!! cheating is when you are in an exclusive relationship and one or both seek outside the relationship. if you are broken-up--you are NOT together!!!!

i am so done with this...

yes baby ur more ignorant then the people at Borat's movie. u have no difference with them
uk doesnt need united states of as5holes to be saved.
you dont save the freedoms but you destroy people's freedoms.
you just save the jews.
dont pretent like a philosopher, you aint a sh.t
i think u take it soo serious to be a yankee but ur wrong sweety. coz ur obviously a loser and left by the father of ur kid. u cant judge the jealous people. this is not only a feeling for the humans. all the living things has jealousy. if ur not a living thing or if u come from mars or jupiter, then i give you right yeah.
there is nobody tried to control anyone here. when u wanna plan a life together with somebody, you both take some responsibilities. you can not step on eachothers red lines. its something soo serious when u wanna create a life together with somebody. well if u claim people must be totaly free and have no responsibiliies for eachother, nope its not for me. some people can go on dating sites, can go clubbing and can give their number to anyone she met, can flirt with them.. and they can do such things when they r in love with somebody.. and there are also some people like you , who has been left by her man as being a ****, and all you can do is to attack men over their opinions. coz in ur opinion, there is no shame in such activities. lol.. im wasting my time here with talking to you.
u have ur own life and i have my own. i always kept myself away from such woman and thank god i did.
i dont give fcuk to a yankee's opinion about me. u live ur life and i live mine.
u were not told of some moral values. thats y they r meaningless for you

[cameronparkhurst]

i encourage you to seek mental health help immediately.

while i even should not comment other than the above...i hold several university degrees from prestigeous universities--one of which is in interpersonal communications...and now i remember why i never went into psychotherapy cause i cant handle mental health patients like you. i am CEO of a company that i own. when i have time i raise millions of dollars each year for children's charities and domestic violence charities. and i was the youngest person to ever be named board of directors for a museum. and when i have time i am an archaeologist.

further, i own a beautiful home --drive a gorgeous car (lexus) --i spend what most people make in salary on clothing (candan do i have a closet to die for or what??? :P )...i have a great, strong, close, italian american family; a beautiful, brilliant, and healthy son; and a wonderful, successful, brilliant and handsome boyfriend who happens to be from turkey soooo not remotely a loser....

and while its not your business---i divorced my sons father who is also not a loser.

[selcukx55]

Originally Posted by cameronparkhurst

i encourage you to seek mental health help immediately.

while i even should not comment other than the above...i hold several university degrees from prestigeous universities--one of which is in interpersonal communications...and now i remember why i never went into psychotherapy cause i cant handle mental health patients like you. i am CEO of a company that i own. when i have time i raise millions of dollars each year for children's charities and domestic violence charities. and i was the youngest person to ever be named board of directors for a museum. and when i have time i am an archaeologist.

further, i own a beautiful home --drive a gorgeous car (lexus) --i spend what most people make in salary on clothing (candan do i have a closet to die for or what??? :P )...i have a great strong close italian american family, a beautiful, brilliant, and healthy son, and a wonderful, successful, brilliant and handsome boyfriend who happens to be from turkey soooo not remotely a loser....

and while its not your business---i divorced my sons father who is also not a loser.

first of all, maşallah to ur son.
but i see ur a bit stressed baby. why? i didnt ask ur education, ur job, ur house and ur bf why do you need to tell yourself? do you think they show your value? are the poor and uneducated people less valuable then you? i dont think so babe. we say in turkish '' cehalet gider ama eşeklik baki kalır'' that means ''ignorance can be solved but stupidity stays forever'' . u have some diplomas an nice house bla bla.. yes i have a univercity diploma too and i speak 2 languages. soo what? do you think ur more valuable than me? maybe u are i dont know. but you cant claim that. nobody knows you and me here.
dont pretend like being something with the things you own.
i give value to people who has a beautiful heart. not to people who has millions of dolars.
i think you would be a great charachter for the new Borat film He needs people like you.
being well educated and being rich doesnt mean alot..most of the famous cruel people are well educated and rich. your humanity and ur heart's beauty is the most important thing. and please stop being vain actually u need some therapies. ur diplomas n money cant help you about being vain

wish we could also listen ur ex hubby's opinions about you.. maybe ur not a saint as u say!!
to praise urself is not good honey. ur turkish fella should have taught u this.....

[cameronparkhurst]

Again, I strongly encourage you to seek mental health help.

[selcukx55]

Originally Posted by cameronparkhurst

Again, I strongly encourage you to seek mental health help.

Tickle me. i cant laugh anymore
i strongly advice you to go make some pie to your turkish fella. its bayram today. dont waste ur time with showing on internet how vain n arrogant you are.

[Labonita]

Originally Posted by selcukx55

Tickle me. i cant laugh anymore
i strongly advice you to go make some pie to your turkish fella. its bayram today. dont waste ur time with showing on internet how vain n arrogant you are.

selcuk... dont even bother,,, it looks like joanne just open a new account here and shes messin with ya...

[cameronparkhurst]

labonita---i am not joanne--if you look at when i opened this account that might clue you in and everyone here knows me---

[Labonita]

Whatever... I just think its not our business.. To get involved whit the relationship between those two people.. They have sure done bad things both of them.. but its not up to us and judge them cuz they sure aint tellin the whole truth i guess..

[cameronparkhurst]

whatever???? same to you...an apology would be prefered---and further, if they dont want comments--they should not post on a PUBLIC forum!!

selcuk is clearly immature to post what he posted and omg telling me to make pie for taner!! what am i a slave????

how cute he erased his comments

[Labonita]

So i should apologize to you ? Oh ok, and who are u? President of united states..?

but hey, i dont wanna argue with anyone here.. I just think its wrong to pick a side and judge selcuk or joanne.. cuz they have done immature things on both sides...

Yeah if u look at making a "pie" or whatever to ur man to selebrate bayram is a "slave-job" Then ok!! So anyone who makes theyr man dinner is a slave.. good one!!

[cameronparkhurst]

i think a man telling a female to go into the kitchen and cook is like a woman being a slave-----sorry in america men and women are equal!! and nope i am not president but i have known him since i was 12 years old and now 34!! and accusing me of being someone i am not absolutely deserves an apology --well someone with class

[Labonita]

You are a real dutch bag... ur sooo bragging about ur car your house you closet.. and oh my gooooood do u know the president???

I know what u mean, but its not like he gave u an order to go into the kitchen and cook.. men and woman are equal, but im sure u know what i mean..
Like making something nice for bayram isnt a slave job.. its just being a good wife/gf..

yeah, but it just sounded a littlebit wierd cuz u were all over selcuk and protected joanne.. who's sounding like a prostitute on the way she's being described...

And if u want an apology for me thinking u were joanne..
Oh im so sorry, i would prefer that too..

But hey, if u dont show respect u dont get respect! No matter if u got a big closet or knows the president..!