Crooked and bowed like the branch of a tree
my roots are dead and I’m without leaves
bare and worthless my bark is scarred
my sap runs red and the cold is hard
I soak the poison up from the earth
my seeds have died they can not feed
my life has run it's course too soon
tortured and cut down I am on my knees
and every time I get back up you always there never going away, holding love at bay
you always have to lie, leap out and hurt me whenever the opportunity strikes you are bad,
your' a cad, you are so ****ing wrong.
And you follow from a distance bringing pain and hate, I just can't seem to contemplate
a reason for your treason or your sickening state. Reduced I am.
Withered
cracked skin
Withered
stick thin
Withered
brittle soul
Withered
so alone
so long did I stand now designated to fall
years have passed but I weathered the thrall
strong was I in a life now forgotten
now I shrivel and my soul is blackened
now I'm crushed beneath the weight of sin
I am the last of a long and noble breed
when my body falls and becomes the earth
look back on a life of thought, hopes and dreams
now you've driven me into the this suicide run, where there is no winning only losing now that
the time has come for me to decay, once young and brave now old and grey.
I sink into sleep for ever more in the hopes that I will live to be free of all the lies and
mother****ing misery that you did sow in my life. Broken I am.
Withered
cracked skin
Withered
stick thin
Withered
brittle soul
Withered
so alone
chopping me down now I can't resist
the weak must fall the strong persist
when you realise your time is done
conclude the truth about what you are
withered...
-
Withered
-
I can see how this would go in musical form, cant get a total sense of the song but the structure is so strong that i'm really curious what it would sound like!
The last line of the first verse really caught me, after a moment, i got an idea about how the emphasis of singing could really bring out the meaning of "the cold is hard"....sometimes i think a phrase just seems too simple in comparison to how it is actually felt. Am i right on that?Music is what feelings sound like
Listen to the Love
~♥♥~ -
Damn. This is the closest I've seen to my type of writing. I absolutely love this. The chorus is great, all the verses are awsome.. Im glad you used such vivid imagery, I think that's the most overlooked aspect of lyrical writing these days. Explaining in detail how you see a tree or how you smell a flower, something as simple as that, can be made into a work of art if you do it right.
"now I'm crushed beneath the weight of sin
I am the last of a long and noble breed
when my body falls and becomes the earth
look back on a life of thought, hopes and dreams"
This is great. So great. I love how you used consonance and assonance (my favorite elements)
Using 'long, noble breed' to mesh with 'thoughts, hopes and dreams' two lines down was genius. Perfect example of what I'm talking about.
Now, tell me something. Are you from England or something? When I read this I get a strong accent.. -
Wales dude but i call england a second home! cheers guys !!!!!!!!