I sat down last night and decided to have an exercise. The 1st 3 words of the 1st verse popped in my head a few days ago and I finally wrote them down, so I decided to experiment with using 3 words consecutively with the same starting letter throughout the song that could be sang fairly easy and still make a point. I do have somewhat of a melody in mind. If it stinks or just doesn't work, that's fine, just say so, but I like a no holds barrel critique when I do my little experiments. It helps me perfect or reject the idea altogether. Input would be appreciated.



Pathetic petty people at the rumor mill
Gather up all the gossip that they can spill
Callous careless creatures with no life of their own
Nasty nosey nitwits with a heart of stone

They don't care if what they say is true
as long as there's someone to tell it to

They're
Low lifes
Shallow pools
Grapevines without the fruit.
Low lifes
Empty fools
Good for nothing; destitute

Raucous ranting racists in white garb and hood
Spew their spiteful hatred burning crosses of wood
Ignorant inbred idiots in silly dress
Mean mindless men who thrive on racial unrest

They judge a man by the color of skin
call him names and try to degrade him

They're
Low lifes
Shallow pools
Grapevines without the fruit.
Low lifes
Empty fools
Good for nothing; destitute

I know they have the right to be heard
and we have the right to flip'em the bird

They're
Low lifes
Shallow pools
Grapevines without the fruit.
Low life's
Empty fools
Good for nothing; destitute


© L. James Tanner

I don't know what your "experiment" was about,but I dig this.I could sing the verses and rap the refrain.Cool.

Originally Posted by Doug Denslowe

I don't know what your "experiment" was about,but I dig this.I could sing the verses and rap the refrain.Cool.

Thanks Doug!....The experiment was with using 3 words consecutively with the same starting letter and not having it come out corny or redundant. I too see a partial rap in this, and maybe throughout the whole thing, but I also have another tune floating around my "noggin" for it.

Don't get me wrong,I "understood"your experiment,I just chose to ignore it!This is a real great song with TONS of potential.If I was playing with a band,I'd ask you if I could play this.That the highest praise I could offer!

Originally Posted by Doug Denslowe

Don't get me wrong,I "understood"your experiment,I just chose to ignore it!This is a real great song with TONS of potential.If I was playing with a band,I'd ask you if I could play this.That the highest praise I could offer!

I really appreciate that Doug, I really do. I was unsure of it and how it would be received.

This needs nothing but praise! Good theme, well expressed, fascinating aliterations. Thanks again, LooknGlass