Than again....No! (please give opinions)

COMMENTS/VIEWS WOULD BE REALLY APPRECIATED.

Get ready for this; I can hear the hospital calling from here, from here,
Whether I break a leg, or die in my own vein, I’ll still need an ambulance,
To top me up with distant pain.
Your breath used to heal me, your eyes scouring my name,
Your head lifting skylights,
My losses mocking my lost gain,

I’m the radiator, that cools you down when you are cold,
I’m the hatred hater, that’s tells you off when you’ve been told,
I’m the raging mountain; you’re the tear in that lake,
I’m that voice inside your mouth that reminds you how you are so fake.

And how many times, can your makeup hide your eyes,
And how many rhymes can I make up that rhyme with lies,
And all too often you’ll sit back,
And wonder whether you,
Should let us go, Attack! Attack!
Its not why the questions who?

The chair legs buckling with weight,
From your massive ego you contemplate,
The lights are off, the switches on,
Suddenly everything is gone,
You see me in a place called hell,
It’s not your ego no, your wrong,
Not you’re home, or the hotel,
Its catering, you’re catered out,
The doormat makes you scream and shout,
You hate the way the tear falls,
As my smile widens wall to wall, to wall, to wall.

Deep, powerful but what's "my own vein?"

if you mean "a futile attempt", change it to "in vein"but if you mean an artery like capillary then you can't die in your own vain.