You should have tried experimenting with a paper shredder after you wrote this.
You should have tried experimenting with a paper shredder after you wrote this.
I love this song. It is memorable, it has it's own unique feel, it's concise and it has a nice rhythm. You have achieved the goal of songwriting; you make people think!
Thank you raskolnikov, I really appreciate that
Look! My mouth is a fountain!
you should never expect everyone to like your text,
btw.. could someone help me by giving thoughts about the line "the rats all left my head/the rehab left me dead"?
thank you
Look! My mouth is a fountain!
i think it's a decent line
""the rats" is a 'word' for the delirium tremens (psychosis of chronic alcoholism), both lines tell the story of a person full of madness being drained and ending up boring. "
This is what happened to Hemingway. He was an alchoholic with mental demons, he took electro-shock therapy, then he couldn't write anymore and killed himself. I don't have an alternate for your line, but to get an idea check out the Rush song 'Losing It':
The writer stares with glassy eyes
Defies the empty page
His beard is white, his face is lined
And streaked with tears of rage.
Thirty years ago, how the words would flow
With passion and precision,
But now his mind is dark and dulled
By sickness and indecision
And he stares out the kitchen door
Where the sun will rise no more...
....For you, the blind who once could see
The bell tolls for thee...
Looking at how great authors have dealt with a similar idea can help with songwriting. Niel Peart (Rush's drummer and songwriter) makes allusions to two of Hemingway's novels: 'The Sun Also Rises' and 'For Whom the Bell Tolls', as well as subtly touching on the tragic circumstances at the end of his life. I like to reference Camus, Sartre, and Dostoyevsky; great writers inspire great songwriting!
Last edited by Raskolnikov; 12-09-2008 at 07:57 PM.
hmmm thank you very much for this, that really helps
Look! My mouth is a fountain!
i like it - although i found it confusing
i think there should be less 'I''s in it
part from that i really like it
thank you
Look! My mouth is a fountain!
Why is it called "Corinthian"? To me it seems to have nothing to do with sex or temple priestesses at all.
Bernd
unique. stick with the rehab left me dead
Destruction is not the human way, it's greeds way. The human way is hope and finding our own way.
Corinthian is also a character from the sandman (dream) series.. its the character I took a lot of inspiration from... this is sort of his story... the song might actually have something to do about sex.. but thats up to you isnt it?![]()
Look! My mouth is a fountain!
i really like it..! cool lyrics..!!
It's great.
Some simple logic is in affect.
thank you guys!
Look! My mouth is a fountain!