You and Me

Just stumbled on this, I think I wrote it a week or so ago and then forgot about it. Structure may seem a little strange, but I remember that I had a musical pattern laid out in my mind.

You and Me

~1~
We began as a lie
So why did we try
To say it was true
When all reality
Was just fantasy
Then I hated you
And so did you

~2~
What do I mean
Well I can't explain
Or I can't say
Cause you said to forget
Old times once met
So I'm forgetting you
But I love you

~bridge 1~
Every scene was dated
So your love was shaded
In veils of mystery
And now it's history...

~bridge 2~
But it's not, like you think
And I won't let it drink
My last ounce of life
Tho I still feel the knife...

~Chorus~
I'll forever be cursed
By an undying thirst
For the dream we knew
That was not me and you

~fade~
But it was
It is
You and Me

~3~
I might think it hurts
When I say the words
That you no longer feel
Tho I know you do
So I cry for you
Coz it couldn't be real

~background vocal~
But it was
It is
You and Me

~4~
Your sweet kiss
Is my eternal bliss
And holding your hand...
And your angel eyes...
Still defy the lies...
Hold me dear, if you can...

~bridge 1~
Every scene was dated
So your love was shaded
In veils of mystery
So now it's history...

~bridge 2~
But it's not like you think
I won't let it drink
My last ounce of life
Tho I still feel the knife...

~Chorus~
I'll forever be cursed
By an undying thirst
For the dream we knew
That was not me and you

~5~
As eternities roll
I will kiss your soul
But I cry from goodbye
And what will never be
Because I can only see
That you've married a lie

~bridge 1~
Every photo was dated
So your love was shaded
In veils of mystery
So now it's history...

~bridge 2~
But it's not, like you think
I won't let it drink
My last ounce of life
Tho I still feel the knife...

~Chorus~
I'll forever be cursed
By an undying thirst
For dreams we once knew
But they weren't me and you

~Chorus 2~
All the dreams we once knew
Of me and you
Could never be true
But I'll die loving you

~background/outro~
It was
And is
You and Me

It was
It is
You and Me

Hold me dear
If you can

Wow. This is a really beautiful song. I feel every word that you say and all the verses choruses and bridges blend so well. I love this.

Moon,

I like it a lot, and the structure is great actually, very concise and precise and with a definite rhythm and flow.
Your ability to condense the message in such short sentences is amazing!

However, as a person who loves singing (and does that on a frequent basis - like under shower LOL, family gatherings, parties ) I have to tell you that you put a heavy load on any potential singer's shoulders (=memory) by writing so many verses in one song.

I know, I know, sometimes you have to give more to express yourself fully, but then 5 verses, 2 bridges (with slight alterations), 1 chorus and 1 fade seem a bit too much, huh? By writing too much verses you also put a heavy pressure on the composer's part - the melody will have to be truly brilliant to help the singer memorize the lyrics

Will you give it a thought next time?

Originally Posted by roses4ria

Wow. This is a really beautiful song. I feel every word .... I love this.

Thank you so much, especially because you write so beautifully yourself

Paul, I won't bother to quote the 9-millimeter rounds that you fired noooo seriously, thanks for pointing out something that I can see very easily myself now, especially because I can't quite remember how all the rhythms went now ... :-/ ... One mistake I always make is that I forget my cell phone has a audio recorder that I could actually sing into, while I have something new in my head, so I won't forget the flow of something so complicated as this one is ... or was, because I can't quite remember how I had it worked out now.

BUT, I believe you're 100 percent right, it's just too complicated. And I can easily do a couple of things to simplify the ending structure ... I'll work on it, coz yeah I love singing in the shower too!! But the sheet music always gets sopping wet and soapy, and the ink runs down my arm, and it's just a really big mess

Thanks both of you, for reading and for commenting!

LOL , sooooooooooooooooooo you sing too, Mister Moon!!!
Care for sharing your moonish voice with us?
Looking forward to hearing from you!

"Then I hated you
And so did you"


I love this song. Like really, why didn't I write this?

Yeah Paul, shower and driving with the radio cranked and windows rolled up tight

Angel I know exactly what you mean. How many times have I read something written by others here and thought the same thing? More times than I can count, for sure.