My First Whole Rap , Comment Plz !

Okayy iThink iGot VerseTwoo &nd VerseThree Dwn But Its VerseOnee That Throwsx Me Off , Any Ideas ? Pleasee Help &nd Give Ideas .

VerseOnee:
( Well This Is Mahh Lifee Soo Imma Live Iht Hardd , No Niqqahsx Gonna Get Tahh Mee , Andd Definetlyy Not Themm Broadss , iDoes This By Myself , Dnt Needd Anyybody Elsee , Been Ohn My Ownn Since , iStartedd Gettinqq Thee Beltt ,
My Momma Calledd Mehh Lazyy , Mahh Daddyy Wasx Real Shadyy , He Hadd Racksx Ohn Racksx Ohn Racksx But Refusedd Tahh Takee Caree Of His Babiess , All He Ever Did , Was Buy Us Ah Pair Of Shoes , Noww He Behind Barsx , &nd iRefusee Tahh Sharee Thee News . ) NEED SOME FCKING ADJUSTMENTS !

Chorus:
......

VerseTwoo:
As Ah Kid , I Triedd Tahh Act Mahh Shoee Sizee , Fck My Agee , iWasx Ah Lil Bit Too Wisee , Start'd Readinqq One Paqee &nd Alreadyy Knew Thee Next , These Hoesx Thinkk Theyy Knoww Mehh But Im Trulyy Too Complexx , Aint Nobodyy Knoee , My Lifee And How iLive Iht , iLive Iht To The Fullest But Haters Just Won't Admit , Theyy Hate Ohn My Stylee , Theyy Sayyh Fckk My Lyrics , Theyy Just Ah Pair Ah Basics &nd Im Rightfullyy The Realest !

Chorus:
......

VerseThree:
iWasx Younqq But Nevahh Younqq &nd Dumbb , Put Up With Alot **** &nd Got Plentyy More Tahh Comee , iAlreadyy Knoww Thee Ropessx &nd Thee Wayy Thee World Runn , But Im Not Runninqq Frm It , Im Runninqq Towarddsx Iht For Funn , iLaughh Aht Thee Bullshit , Never Mak'nn Uhp Excuses , Ihf iEver Did Wronq iBe Like Ol'well Duecesx Cuz iCan Be Ah Nuisancee , Money Stay Ohn My Mind Likee Its Surgicallyy Implant'd , But You Knoww The Deal Man Im Simply Enchantedd .

Dude, I swear, some of the lines in verse 1 sounds REALLY REALY familiar.

Change verse 2, can't use my lines in a whole rap

ACTUALLY this time I'll let u

but only the line u used

Call me crazy but Here’s an idea... Write your own verses!!!
That is if what Z said is true. Name even said something about your lines.
as far as the lyrics, not bad... But this is were I have conflict. Judging on your writing that possibility isn't yours.If it was me, I would start from scratch not only to make it better but to show them all
that you don't need a ghost writer to do your work for you.


Good luck...

Originally Posted by SK'nDeep

Call me crazy but Here’s an idea... Write your own verses!!!
That is if what Z said is true. Name even said something about your lines.
as far as the lyrics, not bad... But this is were I have conflict. Judging on your writing that possibility isn't yours.If it was me, I would start from scratch not only to make it better but to show them all
that you don't need a ghost writer to do your work for you. Good luck...

I Didh Use My Own Lyrics , Except The (As Ah Kid , I Triedd Tahh Act Mahh Shoee Sizee , Fck My Agee) Part That Camee From Zarexx . /

Originally Posted by Namel3ss

Dude, I swear, some of the lines in verse 1 sounds REALLY REALY familiar.

VerseOnee Is All Minesx , Onlyy In ZerseTwoo (As Ah Kid , I Triedd Tahh Act Mahh Shoee Sizee , Fck My Agee) Thats Zarexx Lyrics .

Well next time, try ASKING FOR PERMISSION before you use sOmeone else's lines

I agree. Good point Name.

I won't even bother to read this.
Write in English please. Mahh Tahh Ahh Wahh What The Fxck ?

Agree completely with Molotova. Usually I won't even pay attention to the raps on this forum. Except for a few members. Now that I've actually paid attention, I've realized I've wasted my time. Grow up, kid.