Madness Rap

hi everyone am new here thought id post my first lyrics be nice for some feedback

i wake up to sadness and feel so bad
ive had it with this blackness i scream like im mad
and its just afew things with i cant cut the strings
its singing of its sorrow never stops till ill pop
so i rock like im mental thinkin i should top
myself like im meant to see nobody can help me
the pain it keep hitting im insane i keep spitting
im living but im dead but really whats the difference?!
this body is my prision with its mind and its visions
is it time to just give in feel the blood start dripping?
what point do i serve as my nerves keep twitching?
it hurts even worse as i question my purpose
im nothing but a nervous aging drug addict

from that moment i was ten right there is where i had it
both those habbits have savaged my existance
im demeneted deranged dangerous and insane
danny day double d is just aload of trouble see?
i hold this knife closley dont you dare try to cuddle me
cuz love means nothing after all that ive seen
its crushes dreams and makes ya fall without screaming
how the **** can love possibly exist now?
the dust clouds rose as my eyes just froze
as the images burned i just cant adjust em
little film clips play until the eruption
dont think you know a ****ing thing about corruption
make no assumption here take all my nothing

break every something and leave without a memory
what am i meant to be this voice inside says to me
little choice few options and way too many problems
theres no bottom of this bottle as the bottle meets rists
its this emptyness inside that still riddles my mind
but im kind and wont share it and what do you care its
none of your business like youd ever understand
im no man damn it just a damaged little boy
stuck in the past with his stupid little toys
a way back void with times i didnt enjoy
ive employed this great barrier of personal defence
a huge ****in fence that not even my close friends
can ever try to scale or break down theyve just failed

to my grave its electified and yes you might ask why
to which ill state a lie thats security level one
besides which anyways its such a long story
it started with a little girl i knew called Laurie
the rest well forget it so **** you i aint saying
even though sometimes i just feel like im playing
with my life as these pills kick in and start slaying
my brain with its dopamine my god i love you codine
where would i be without such drugs its true
theyve kept me so sustained reduced pressure and the pain
kept the trains on the tracks and knives in the cupboard
has there ever been a moment in your life i ask
when everything shatters and the past comes back?

try to peice it together and collect the broke glass
the memories feel like ash as they slowly float away
on the breeze of a bad day as all ya hope fades away...

This is some heavy lyric, serious stuff. For that reason I think it's fantastic. I can't make any musical sense from the structure but thanks for putting this up, it's defo worthy. Btw I can't add a "Thank You" coz it appears that I've used up my daily quota and the button isn't showing. So just, Thanks

thanks for ya comment - it doesnt actually flow :P

ive got it on audio can i post it on here???

Woah that's beast man, I think you can idk I'm still new here myself (though I'm a senior member.,)
I'd love to hear it, and I'd like to see more lyrics from yah, mate.
Haha^^

-Shadow

lol i could always email ya the audio!

Email me then silly!
ShadowLeeSharp@aol.com...
These lyrics are cool haha

ill get on it as soon as i can mate!

Mmkay! Haha