Land of Wonder.. (New song)

This is like a twisted version of Alice in wonderland. metaphoric for hell/Mylife/nightmares...ect....
I wrote this on a whim in a wierd mood not too long ago and forgot to post it....please leave feed back Thanks


Land of wonder


Hook
Where are we? where the **** did we land?
Where do we come? from I don't understand.
Is there a plan a way out of the land of the damned?
How much torture can you stand? in the land of wonder.


VS1
Incarcerated in the mind arsenic laced n the air.
Killing brain cells like a virus, but no body cares.
Poisoned by mental battery no power to go on actively.
People in despair dragged down with gravity.
But in this wonderland you never want to land.
Like you'd understand what it's like to be pelted with lime stone and sand.
Cause my world's a cyclone a place full of dread nothings ahead.
Exposing you to your live bones like the night of living dead.
Forming illusions in your head chasing a rabid white rabbit.
Asthmatic crack attics consuming mushrooms in bad habits.
Took a crack at it now your focused on the walls.
Moving in your losing him with out a guide here your lost.
What are you to do now your back at the basics screwed again.
This ain't where the journey ends it's where it soon begins.
Like a game of chess you can never move to win.
Lose it all to a life or death bet against sin in the land of wonder.......



Hook
Where are we? where the **** did we land?
Where do we come? from I don't understand.
Is there a plan a way out of the land of the damned?
How much torture can you stand? in the land of wonder.

VS2
Disoriented from exhaustion, collapsing to the ground.
Half way home you hear a mad laughter, a sound.
Deep in black matter, here commonsense lacks to matter.
Plundering in nonsense, must be the mad hatter.
Unlucky every were you go, a black cats follows.
Walked under a mile of ladders stack in a row.
Met the diabolic queen of hate, here there is no love.
With a face of a snake offing heads just for the fun.
Like its a race against fate, each victim gets there head on a stake.
The royal honor of they're sinister ways, Left in a place.
Full of snaring cannibals in a line to be on a plate and ripped apart like wild animals.
No match for them all you can't escape. when track you by your pheromones.
Scary moans your alone, laying in a pit with bare bones.
You plundered to deep now your literally dying from hunger.
Buried six feet under others in the land of wonder.

Told you it was wierd... lol.... so what do you think....

Copyright 11/03/2011

Haha weird?..maybe. but I get it for the most part. You have good transitions and great metaphores for bad luck. All in all I got a.dark almost sinister feel and i like it a lot. Great piece skn

Thanks Smooth...I have a bunch of stuff on here too. Feel free to go to all my started threads and view my work...
More new stuff will be comming...

I agree with Smooth, it's not weird, it's rather sinister. But I like your dark side aswell. Gotta give you props again !

your lyricism is up there, for sure.
I'd recommend finding a suitably skilled producer to collab with or putting a lot of time into working on the music yourself and getting full original tracks out there. Honestly if you focussed on that entire process and put it out right a Sk'n album would get huge esteem.

thanks to all...I wasn't sure about it. thanks for the props...

"...rabid white rabbit. Asthmatic crack attics..."
Are you kidding me skin..? Nuts. That was insane. That line alone would have me listening to this song all the time.
"...pheromones. Scary moans your alone.." This is crazy as well.
Props man, in my personal opinion, your flow/lyrics have increased ten-fold since I joined here and that was in July I think. Get em duuuuudeeeee.

Tre. Thanks for the props... I have always. Second guessed my self for some reason. But with feed back it insures me that I have a chance to make it... I thank you all for your inspetation and support. With out it. I would be lost in the land of wonder.... One love...