stone hearts

Thread: stone hearts

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  1. golden crown said:

    Post stone hearts

    She ain't budgin,.listen to him,his heart aches for you
    no..she ain't hearin
    she's indifferent,though he's insistent
    she just wont crack n understand him..its no different
    love on the rocks,thorns we keep walkin on
    mistakes every now n then they keep stalkin on
    get your case straight but she keeps dodgin on
    switch play to heart gears so they keep rollin on
    on my bended knees..maybe i was wrong,
    maybe my steps weren't right all along..i beg on please
    but they wont just take it..livin a string attatched to it
    n you wont just break it
    stone hearts..that's the theme come on
    take the iron armor put it on..dress up your stone heart
    they aint gettin you..quit gettin them
    get your life on track,have it rollin on wheels like a sewin machine..stitchin hems.
  2. golden crown said:

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    16 bars..any comments..
  3. smoothtung's Avatar

    smoothtung said:

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    The lyrical potency of the substance you have is actually decent, although I think its an over-played subject...
    But thts just my opinion. Tho, your rhyme scheme is odd, and limits the flow of the piece. Play around with re-writes an uncage this thing
  4. golden crown said:

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    thanx..still workin on a re-write for a better rhyme scheme..