Life

Thread: Life

Tags: doug denslowe song
  1. Doug Denslowe's Avatar

    Doug Denslowe said:

    Cool Life

    My Mother died
    When I was young
    My Father never said
    "I love you,son"
    Never liked sports
    Hunting or fishing
    Only liked music
    And Well wishing

    Secretly searching for
    Love and success
    As of this moment
    My Life's a mess
    Can't seem to get out of
    My own way
    Always starts raining
    When I go out to play

    Had to do it
    If it's "Don't you dare!"
    Made up my own mind
    On what was square
    Don't give a damn about
    The Western Decline
    I just care about
    Me and mine

    Secretly searching for
    Love and success
    As of this moment
    My life's a mess
    Can't seem to get out of
    My own way
    Always starts raining
    When I go out to play

    I'm not looking for a
    Sooth-Sayer
    I'm just looking for a
    Guitar player
    Always liked having
    My hair flowing
    Girls,sex and
    My brain glowing

    I'm so tired of
    Waiting on you
    Come on,baby
    What 'cha gonna do
    Don't have time to
    Go to court
    Can't you see
    Life's too short

    11/08. Please tell me what you think,put it to music,thanks.D.D.
    Last edited by Doug Denslowe; 10-22-2012 at 10:34 AM. Reason: To make it easier to read
     
  2. mexico62 said:

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    Hi Doug, I´m sorry that I don´t know a lot about music, I don´t know if you already have the music for this song, but the lyrics are so good, I only suggest you to change the title, for something that say more about the song and take the atention at the first glance, you have the talent to make the lyrics so musical, and I hope to hear this song soon. Saludos desde México.
     
  3. Doug Denslowe's Avatar

    Doug Denslowe said:

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    mexico62:a better song title.Hmmmm,you didn't suggest one,so what do you call a song about Your Life?How about My Life?Not much difference.How about My Great Life,My Exciting Life,Secretly Searching,Life's Too Short,how about a suggestion?I tried to change a song title when I missed typed Girl Interrupted,but was unable to.I know there probably a way,but I'm not hip to it.Thanks for your interest Amigo!
    Last edited by Doug Denslowe; 07-18-2012 at 12:20 AM. Reason: To spell Amigo correctly
     
  4. Frankie Jasmine's Avatar

    Frankie Jasmine said:

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    I liked the first 4/6ths of "Life". You may have to think about that one...

    Neither have I been able to change the "Title" put in the main box.

    Because of the way the first 4/6ths is rich and clear, though sad; then the next 2/6ths goes to short and vague . . . It strikes me that the song (therefore the Life?--how could I know?) seems incomplete. Therefore, it strikes me: "Incomplete Life"? "An Incomplete Life"?

    Doug, I've never written a comment like this before. However, since you said it was about 'your life' . . . that makes the song much more important. The change in writing style from sad, specific past . . . to brief, casual or vague present . . . is too dramatic not to be noticed. (Hope you're still speaking to me after this. If you want me to delete it, let me know.)

    Or am I missing a major point of the song?
     
  5. Doug Denslowe's Avatar

    Doug Denslowe said:

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    Why would I want you to delete this?I count on you for honest criticism and wouldn't want it any other way!This Reply means so much more than the usual,"I like it"or some Comment that isn't really sincere.You read the song Totalily Right!To be honest,I just ran out of good ideas the last couple of verses,and you noticed the drop-off in storyline.The line,"I don't have time to go to court"was a memory of an ex-girlfriend who was dragging me to City Hall to get married!I was thinking of ANY excuse not to go,and thankfully we never did.I remembered that and put it in the song to rhyme,"Life's too short"!Now you know the nexus of this song.First part;strong ideas.Second part,just ran out of good ideas,but,what the hey,I gave it a shot!Life incomplete,you betcha!Keep em coming,I can take it.Roar!
    .
     
  6. MoonRide*r*'s Avatar

    MoonRide*r* said:

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    You can change the title by first clicking Edit Post and then Go Advanced. The second edit box down contains the title.

    When I try to imagine my own music to someone else's well-structured verses, it usually comes out (in my mind) somewhere between a Bob Dylan ballad, a Clapton whatever, and Elvis's Blue Christmas. In this case it worked very well. As for meaning, I read my own story into it and that worked pretty good too.
    There is no glamour in sudden death, and nobody ever wins a war.
    :
    Rockers Unite! =>
    ROCK 'n' Roll Halls of Fame
     
  7. amaryn's Avatar

    amaryn said:

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    Hahaha, Doug, why did I not come across your poetry and songs earlier on? Flower Bro!
    I'd have changed the title to a challenging "Don't You Dare", as this ex gf of yours didn't manage to grab you finally and
    otherwise you took the challenge of living whilst all around you seemed pretty negative to say it mildly.
    "Life" gives me too much the impression of completeness and- as you said - it bl''hell isn't as long as you keep breathing.
    WOW, I should have been sporting already an hour ago, but I am glued to these poems of yours.
    The flows of thanks to Cisco is like a continuous Gulfstream
     
  8. Peter Both said:

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    The song could work if the music takes on another direction from the 5th stanza onwards. Up to that point: just acoustic guitars. And then the whole band joins in. No more introspection, it's party time!
     
  9. Doug Denslowe's Avatar

    Doug Denslowe said:

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    @Amaryn:this is about another girl.I've have a few in my Life.This isn't Wild West Diablo Diane
    @Peter:these Lyrics never were put to music.But you have good intowishin.(this device says I've misspelled intowishin but I looked it up,so there!)If this ever does get put to music,I'll certainly do exactly what you say.If we didn't live on different continents,I'd consider having you either play in my band or manage it!
     
  10. Peter Both said:

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    That would a great honor, Doug! But I think I'm a bettter musician than manager.
     
  11. Doug Denslowe's Avatar

    Doug Denslowe said:

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    Next time your in San Francisco,let me know.I'd love to jam with you.