Imma drop bombs like Em on infinite/
So just relax and get in the seat/
Nobody can touch this/
Im the king of the diss/
When i shoot i never ****ing miss/
Before you make your mind hold on it gets better/
Listen to the word, this is just the first letter/
Here starts the battle/
A one i will not settle/
Dont ever try to change the mother****ing channel/
I learned how to rap as a sophmore in high school/
You shouldnt try to challenge me before night fool/
Im so raw i could fight a bull/
And drop your mic into a pool/
I like to **** chicks/
You like to suck *****/
and swallow their man milks/
Im a veteran, old like a dinosour/
Youre a child, still got a minor soul/
Im higher than ladders/
I use many patterns/
And after ill kill you imma visit your parents/
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first song i wrot, please give me some feedback
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gotta watch your syllable counts per line, they're all over the place here. good to see you use multi rhymes. could do with more thought cuz if you read it back there's some childish/cheesy lines going on there... like could you ever imagine Eminem saying you shouldn't challenge him before night? so that means at night it's ok to challenge you? see what I mean. also NEVER use the word fool. it's clear people only ever use that when they need a rhyme word on the end of a line. and if you're going to reference an album or artist, make sure it's a good one. saying you're gonna drop like Em on Infinite isn't really much of a boast. need more thought. got potential though.
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Don't rap about stuff that isn't true. If you're going to tell a story tell one that relates to you. Don't make up fake **** in your song just to fill some space, also make sure to keep track of your flow. Gotta make sure it rolls off smooth man, always I'd work on the drops. Good job though man, keep it up.
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Hop in to the battle thread, nothing makes you better IMO than improvisational text battling
Originally Posted by rwjisafaggot
