Melt Down

Verse 1

Hell on earth is what I endured
After our bitter poison break up
Deeps wounds never to be cured
Inflicted upon my very soul

Chorus

I felt like I was breaking into small pieces
And melting into the vast ocean of pain
Living my very own global melt down

Verse 2
Streets never looked so gray and lonely
People pushing each other out of the way
The only place of comfort is my bed and TV
In my house and my mind I will stay

Chorus

I felt like I was breaking into small pieces
And melting into the vast ocean of pain
Living my very own global melt down

Bridge

I still get flashes of fleeting false hope
When I see your updated profile
But you are smiling for somebody else
Ohh for Somebody else

Chorus

I felt like I was breaking into small pieces
And melting into the vast ocean of pain
Living my very own global melt down....

Hey, on the whole this is a pretty good piece. I dig the "fleeting false hope" bit, I think we've all been in that situation before. Also, love me some alliteration!
I would, however, suggest that it probably needs something else to break it up a little (excuse the pun.) You need to develop beyond the idea that without this girl your life is one hopeless drag. Perhaps offer a differing perspective. Write from your perception of her point of view? Talk about how there is an escape from the bad feelings? It just needs a little something extra, in my opinion.
Additionally, I would probably rephrase the chorus somewhat. Unfortunately for all of us lyricists/poets the word 'pain' has pretty much lost all emotive connotations. Thanks a lot, emo music. I guess my point is that you should make use of a more emotive means of expressing your sentiment. You don't even need to directly address the idea that she has caused you some sort of emotional pain. Have a look at 'Red' by Ted Hughes and you'll see what I mean.
Keep up the good work buddy

Just occurred to me that a good example of offering the opposing perspective can be seen in Somebody That I Used to Know by Gotye. Check out how the verse that Kimbra sings balances out and challenges the ideas presented in the previous two verses. Really adds a lot of interest to the song at the point where it would've become very stale otherwise.