Just wanted to see what you guys thought.

Rough draft, i know it still needs some work. To be honest this is the first song i written. So a little guidance will be appreciated. It took me a hour or so. I plan to work on it more and touch things up. I need to study more about verses, bridges, chorus, refrains, and climbs.

The song refers to my past relation with my ex-wife. Things i messed up and the pain i cause.
I call it: Much Longer

I got married at the age of eightteen.
Standing at the alter, looking into her eyes as they gleamed.
Saying those two little words.
I didn't understand, the pain that immerged.
These are the thoughts of my past
Reminiscing of visions to explain why it didn't last.
Four years of service, maybe thats the reason.
The time we spent apart, every other season.
I know it hard on a woman, that is true.
So when i finally got out, i thought we made it through.
Finally had a house of our own.
Not given to us by a government loan.
That only seemed to seperate us further.
As i sit here and think, i know this reason was combined with others.

This is the situation that i am going through.
My thoughts my seem spradictic but, i am trying to say what is true.
People tell me what don't break me, will make me stronger.
Well i hope their right cause i don't know if i will make it much longer.
I did it to myself their is no doubt.
I bang on this earthly door to let me out.
If you listen to my voice you can hear despair.
As i wish for death, telling myself life aint fair.

Sifting through memories in my mind.
Examining each thought, hoping for a clue to find.
Completely exhausted i slip into a slumber.
The dream i had is only one of many numbers.
It started off with a warm hug and a kiss from my wife.
The laughter of my daughter, the joy of my life.
This is when i come back to.
Cause everything i seen i know isn't true.
As i sit in the house all alone.
I know my last chance with you is blown, no fault but my own.
Choosing to play a game, instead speaning time with you.
which lead us to yelling at each other until our faces were blue.


This is the situation that i am going through.
My thoughts my seem spradictic but, i am trying to say what is true.
People tell me what don't break me, will make me stronger.
Well i hope their right cause i don't know if i will make it much longer.
I did it to myself their is no doubt.
I bang on this earthly door to let me out.
If you listen to my voice you can hear despair.
As i wish for death, telling myself life aint fair.


Now its time for me to speak the hard truth.
I think it all start back in my youth.
A violent explosion, i laid a hand on my mother.
Which eventually lead to me laying hands on another.
The man that was suppose to love and protect.
Threaten your life and made you fell like a reject.
This guilt inside, its tearing me apart.
I know i am the one that pushed you away, the one that broke your heart.
I am trying to take responbility, please here me out.
I am trying to tell you i understand what it was all about.
Please listen to this line because i am sincere.
I'm sorry, it was my fault, i am just trying to be clear.
I wish i was a better husband to my wife.
I know this now, she was best thing in my life.

This is the situation that i am going through.
My thoughts my seem spradictic but, i am trying to say what is true.
People tell me what don't break me, will make me stronger.
Well i hope their right cause i don't know if i will make it much longer.
I did it to myself their is no doubt.
I bang on this earthly door to let me out.
If you listen to my voice you can hear despair.
As i wish for death, telling myself life aint fair.

Very well written my man, I'm impressed with this. So much emotion but also so much technical discipline in this piece.
Props. I **** with this.