Love On A Platter

*******************
When we met
Nothing seem to matter
I served you straight up
Love On A Platter

At first
Everything was right
You were so salty
And ah,so tight
We lit some candles
Made love all night

Paid you compliments
Always tried to flatter
Served you straight up
Love On A Platter

Then your mom got sick
And so did you
Left me hangin'
Like a French Fried Fool

I guess one day
And it won't be long
I'll find the right chick
Instead of Dead Wrong

Gone are the days
Nothing seemed to matter
You threw it all away
Love On A Platter

2/27/2014

This is a follow up or sequel to the song "French Fry Cool"

You made me blush! ahaha

Originally Posted by Kerri Faye Yates

You made me blush! ahaha

But did you like it?I admit,I forgot a lot of the lines......I wrote it in my head on one of my strolls.But I did want to post something,so I did the best I could with what I could recall.If I waited to "remember"it all, it'd sit in a stack like the other 20 or so songs that I never finish!

Originally Posted by Doug Denslowe

But did you like it?I admit,I forgot a lot of the lines......I wrote it in my head on one of my strolls.But I did want to post something,so I did the best I could with what I could recall.If I waited to "remember"it all, it'd sit in a stack like the other 20 or so songs that I never finish!

Duh!! I would have quit reading if I didnt The first 4 lines are definitely my favorite!

Originally Posted by Kerri Faye Yates

Duh!! I would have quit reading if I didnt The first 4 lines are definitely my favorite!

Thanks Kerri!Coming from you,I feel like it must be okay.I'm a little rusty,but glad you liked it!

Originally Posted by Doug Denslowe

Thanks Kerri!Coming from you,I feel like it must be okay.I'm a little rusty,but glad you liked it!

Oh no, you think too highly of me! Glad I decided to read it

Originally Posted by Kerri Faye Yates

Oh no, you think too highly of me! Glad I decided to read it

I'm glad too!I hope some others take the time..............

I love it Doug. Very clever idea and carried out in a very clever manner. It's cool as a coal miners belt buckle brother.

Originally Posted by BackInBlack

I love it Doug. Very clever idea and carried out in a very clever manner. It's cool as a coal miners belt buckle brother.

Thanks BIB.Hopfeully some others will take the time to give a reply.After all,that's what this site is about;writing and commenting on others lyrics.Some just don't get that;they dump their songs,and then abandon the site "because no one gave me any feedback" forgetting they gave none themselves...........life goes on.

Another solid song, Doug. The directness of "Love On A Platter" is its strength. Also, the song flows well with a storyline beginning-middle-end. I like the ending ("You threw it all away"), a glaring juxtaposition to "I served you straight up" in the earlier refrains!

Something about the tight-knittedness of this song belies your claim that you sort of threw it together. The end result is what matters. Like Ashford & Simpson, "Solid as a rock!"

Originally Posted by Frankie Jasmine

Another solid song, Doug. The directness of "Love On A Platter" is its strength. Also, the song flows well with a storyline beginning-middle-end. I like the ending ("You threw it all away"), a glaring juxtaposition to "I served you straight up" in the earlier refrains!

Something about the tight-knittedness of this song belies your claim that you sort of threw it together. The end result is what matters. Like Ashford & Simpson, "Solid as a rock!"

I'm flattered that you liked this;I thought there might be a line you deemed too vulgar,but I'm glad you gave it a chance!I had hoped for more comments,but again I was disappointed with my fellow writers here at ATL.I can forgive the folks,like you,who only drop in on occasion.The folks I'm pointing the finger at are the ones who post a lot and give no comments.You have been a loyal
friend and for that,I thank you!I will always read and comment on your "stuff".(Also this is a shout out to Amaryn....you too are a friend till the end!)

Totally agree with Frankie there!
This is your strength, Doug: short, witty lines, always (IMHO) very playable and probably singable.
Trifle too nostalgic?
No way"
!
Just digging up memories from Days Long Gone.
The Flo Bro Style!

Thanks,Doug!

Originally Posted by amaryn

Totally agree with Frankie there!
This is your strength, Doug: short, witty lines, always (IMHO) very playable and probably singable.
Trifle too nostalgic?
No way"
!
Just digging up memories from Days Long Gone.
The Flo Bro Style!

Thanks,Doug!

thanks for the reply Amaryn.I think this song lyric is easily put to music,as I hope most of my lyrics are.I'm glad ATL removed the Likes.........without a word of conversation from it's members.This is another assault on my senses!I'm glad I'm coming to this less frequently,the folks I need to communicate with have sent me their Emails or Twitter or Facebook accounts.

I llike how you brought some intimate imagery into this piece...I love "Love on a Platter" as the title and as an excellent metaphor. Knowing the narrative and background of this piece helps me understand it even better. It's short, succinct, and simple. Love it!

Originally Posted by jessie zuppo

I llike how you brought some intimate imagery into this piece...I love "Love on a Platter" as the title and as an excellent metaphor. Knowing the narrative and background of this piece helps me understand it even better. It's short, succinct, and simple. Love it!

Right, Jessie! I couldn't agree more!

Thanks Jessie.......I'm glad I delivered a song lyric you liked!