Needs a title but plz read and comment

Thread: Needs a title but plz read and comment

Tags: None
  1. Matt6660 said:

    Default Needs a title but plz read and comment

    Hello I am a metal, hard rock song writer and guitarist. I am looking for a title for this song and some feed back on if it good or if it suck. I will take any comment. Thanks and hope you guys like this piece. If it's good i will come up with some riffs for it.

    I see the world change
    But you still remain the same*
    Broken bottles in my hand
    Think what went wrong*
    But you'll never see
    The side of me
    You'll never see
    The side of me*
    You left behind.

    You left behind*
    Everything that was yours*
    Everything you had
    It will never turn out*
    To be what I expected*
    *
    Everything I am
    Is everything you need*
    But you will never turn out*
    Anything that I expected*
    I don't belong*
    We got left behind!

    You ask you self*
    What this is*
    Who you are
    All you see*
    All you see*
    Is what was left behind
    Left behind
    Left behind

    Everything I am
    Is everything you need*
    But you will never turn out*
    Anything that I expected*
    I don't belong*
    You don't belong*
    We, we got left behind*
    We got left behind!

    you say to your self*
    What will change*
    What will Change*
    To fix what we had
    But you never realized*
    I was all ready gone!

    Left behind*
    We got left behind
    You let it all slip away.*
     
  2. Inskeepruler's Avatar

    Inskeepruler said:

    Default

    The Abandoned. Outcasted.
    Smilez
     
  3. Matt6660 said:

    Default

    I'll keep in mind. Was it good ok shity?
     
  4. Inskeepruler's Avatar

    Inskeepruler said:

    Default

    No it is good
    Smilez
     
  5. bjw.54 said:

    Default

    every song or lyric should tell a story. yours has told one. I particularly like the stories that are presented in a fractured format. to say that the sentences are not totally proper, rather they express a thought in a few words. you have done this in part of your lyrics and it works well!!
     
  6. Matt6660 said:

    Default

    Thanks man. I made this song in like 5 mins. I was just about to crash one night and it just hit me. I write song that are ok and the go back and fix it, but this one just hit me so hard I never looked back at in and changed it yet.
     
  7. bjw.54 said:

    Default

    I too have this method and just sometimes it does not require editing
     
  8. bjw.54 said:

    Default here we go

    the title I have is "opportunity Lost"