Which sentence should I use in my song?

Thread: Which sentence should I use in my song?

Tags: None

  1. regularturtle said: 08-27-2014 09:40 AM

    Default Which sentence should I use in my song?

    Clear your clouded eyes/Open up your eyes/ Brighten up your eyes?
    Don’t fool yourself, don’t believe
    Their actions are justified
    "Yet it keeps you locked in fear
    There’s not a road you know that leads to anywhere"
    OR
    "You've been told to stay strong
    but you're not sure that's something that you've ever known"
    Last edited by regularturtle; 08-28-2014 at 02:58 AM.
     

  2. Kerri Faye Yates's Avatar

    Kerri Faye Yates said: 08-27-2014 11:33 AM

    Default

    I think the first option is a little wordy in the second line, so personally, I like the 2nd option. It depends what direction you're wanting the rest of the song to go though!
    ~Kerri Faye
     

  3. regularturtle said: 08-27-2014 12:36 PM

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Kerri Faye Yates View Post
    I think the first option is a little wordy in the second line, so personally, I like the 2nd option. It depends what direction you're wanting the rest of the song to go though!
    The song is about changing and adapting in order to move on from something that really impacted your life e.g abuse. The first verse is the past, chorus is the present and the second verse is the future
     

  4. RockinRustle said: 09-09-2014 01:08 AM

    Default

    Id go with the second one out of those 2 options
     

loading