Frankie's poems / prose / personal proverbs

Thank you, Frankie! You have an excellent command of your language , as noticed time after time
And apart from that: the way you explain this contributes to how I should understand this!

Originally Posted by Doug Denslowe

Frankie;
I can HEAR this as a Song!The last verse or one with "the orb"could be a chorus/refrain.It's very Pink Floyd-ish.While reading it I could imagine an echo chamber making the words/lyrics all the more potent.P.S.8 ball,anyone?

Doug, I would like to explore this a little more. I do not "hear" the song. Are you able to express in what way(s) it "sounds" like a rock song? I mean the meaning, of course. But what else is it? I am curious because I don't hear the music. You don't have to spend a lot of time; just some basic ideas that might help me develop it into a song (if I decide).

Frankie,
If I could explain my thoughts as well as you do...........I would,but I can't.It's like when someone asks me,"how did you think of that beat?"it's an organic "vibe"that you either get or you don't.If you don't "hear"it as as song,I'd have to be in a recording studio with you to "explain"it to you.To me,it VERY Dark Side of the Moon.to me it SCREAMS rock me,rock me all night long!Kidding,kind of,but to me,these are Song Lyrics!Or a Poem,either way,it rocks!Trying to explain it isn't my forte.If any of your other Fans can help you,I'm sure they'll chime in.Anybodyo you hear this as a Song?I'm glad you got the 8- ball reference!Note: the above message was the same as this except without the 8-ball reference!The smile face popped up without my permission."Do"is to be there!

Yes,yes,yes, DOUG! In a way I could see myself in a club I used to visit called "hades" where they loved THE DOORS
Great lyrics for them, I'd say. Indeed here poem or song is not the essential question: I hear it, like you do,lol

There you go!Jim Morrison wrote very similar to this.Check out "When the Music's Over"or "The End"those are both on the first Doors Album.This could be a Doors song.That's an explanation!If you can't see it,well,I couldn't explain it any better.Doors,Doors,Doors!Amaryn you duh Man!
Correction:"When the Music's Over" is on "Strange Days" the Doors second album.After 45+ years you tend to get an album mixed up,now and then!

Yes. With The Doors--I get it. Thanks! No prob. So Doors' style it is for The Black Orb!

Dats what we're trying to say!Or just shoot pool with your Black Orb.........it's up to you!

Originally Posted by Frankie Jasmine

. . .


ICY FINGERS


Isn't it odd the way I am?--
Showing hate when I want to give love,
Showing laughter when I want to shed tears?

But when icy fingers of threat
Touch my ledge of security,
Leaving me cold and frightened and sad,
I see myself as
I have been before;
And the sting pierces deeper and
More cruel than ever before.

Then these fingers that were
Conceived in lairs of fear
Melt.
And so they depart.
For they never really existed,

Yet they leave me
Plagued in shadows,
Showing wintery bleakness
While summer's desire eats at my heart.


Frankie Jasmine
Age 15

Hi Frankie!

When reading "Icy Fingers" over and over again in the depth of night I feel the need to put the sauna on.
At the age of 15 you managed to picture so exactly the things that you had felt as being so utterly wrong and inhuman in society, touching problems many have to cope with, as
you admit:

"these fingers....melt:
yet they leave me
plagued in shadows,
showing wintery bleakness
while summer's desire eats at my heart"

It shattered me- and you know why. OK,you were fifteen then and all these years afterwards you have been struggling to beat
these shadows hanging over too many of us into final oblivion.
I find this maybe the most courageous of all your poems. Honesty is something you have always possessed, but here you needed
something more and you shared it with us.

For this a big hug and thanks

Thank you, amaryn. I appreciate these words very much . . .

. . .


CONSCIENCE


Run a red light.
Pick a fight.
Nasty names.
Gain your fame.

Jump on the low down.
Slump around downtown.
Pick a pocket.
Finger in the socket.

Cruise the mean streets.
Huntin’ for fresh meat.
Forget your home.
You’re on your own.

Choose your victim.
Tryin' to get some
Of whatever you want.
Be on the haunt.

Skip school.
Break the rules.
Stick out like a sore thumb.
Feelings go numb.

Spit on the skinny guy.
Don’t ask why,
Just do it
To prove it.

Cut the junkie.
Stomp the punks.
Find a child,
Let yourself go wild.

Fun on the run.
No more ho-hum.
Screw your mother over.
Slither to your cover.

Be a Dad Deadbeat.
Beat-up on your kid
Let him know who is
The Big Fist.

Go to her bed,
Don’t matter she’s a kid.
"She asks for it all day.
Now it's time to pay."

Find you the best high.
Never say die.
Use the chemicals.
Abuse the people.

Somethin’ bad happens
Get the weapons,
Steely iron fist,
Gun on the hip,
Crowbar in the boot,
Boyz in the ‘hood.

Or maybe a white hood
"White is Good!"
Make the call who’s “Dead”
‘Cuz you’re the Skinhead.

Struttin’ and bumpin’
Hear the beat thumpin’
Rise to your cause
Give it no pause.

Steal from your granny
She don’t need it anyway.
Forget your brother;
Kill another.

End of the day
All said and done
You’ve done everyone
Who ever really loved
You in your best times;
Give them the worst time.

And when the challenge comes,
“What have you done?!”
Say it with conviction
And everything in ya,
“I ain’t done nothin’
I’m ashamed of.
Come near and hear:
MY CONSCIENCE IS CLEAR!”



Frankie Jasmine
November 4, 2012

Frankie,
Your message is very close to my latest "release"Real Problems.
Favorite stanza:
Steal from your granny
She don't need it anyway
Forget your brother
Kill another

Question:are you the granny in this?Or are you referring to your granny or just granny's in general?Grannies in general,it seems,but I had to ask!Oh,yeah,well done,right up my alley,could have written it myself(matter of fact,I did,see above mentioned Song Lyric)

Doug, this is too weird. You're right. It is very close to your song "Real Problems" (which is great, by the way!). Promise you--I never saw your song until after I did this poem today! Ooooooh, creepy. But anyway, I declare "Real Problems" the winner over "Conscience."

Glad you like the stanza quoted, but . . . Haha! Funny! Grannies in general is the answer.

Frankie, fierce, monstrous lines of a so called "enfant terrible" clearing the dust from the past.

Again I am speechless by your command of the language- and your honesty!

My favourite lines? " I ain't done nothing I am ashamed of"

"break the rules, stick out like a sore thumb"

However, those loaded with prejudices and lack of humour or understanding of irony and sarcasm, please DON'T read this poem!
or else you'll break your neck! Like:
"use the chemicals, abuse the people" or "maybe a white hood: *white is good*: you make me shiver with obstinance,lol!

Dear ATL friends,

"Conscience" requires some explanation. I want no one to ever think that I feel or think like any of those referred to in the poem! "Conscience" is reflective of realities which I detest and hear of far too often. It is an observation and distillation of some of the worst cases of "man's inhumanity to man." The words, "I ain't done nothing I'm ashamed of; my conscience is clear," are literal words that have been pronounced (announced) publicly by people I've known and by many others.

What triggered the poem was a show I watched of the disappearance and murder of a beautiful 18-yr-old woman. The authorities were on the case for 10 years. It took that long to bring to final justice (50 yrs in jail) to the one who murdered her. After the trial, sometimes families and friends of the murdered one are allowed to come forward in the Court to express their loss, pain, and anger to the killer. In response, the prisoner is sometimes allowed to stand and address the Court regarding what has been said by the family. However, following the "victim impact statements," the convicted man, still sitting in his chair, craned his neck around, faced the family sidelong, and boldly declared, "My conscience is clear."

He said a bit more than that, but that phrase was the final clincher! His words smacked me in the face. I thought: "Oh, my God! I've heard those exact words before!!" That's what set me out to write about the decline into moral bankruptcy, crimes against fellow humans, and the destruction of any form of 'natural love' or affection from one individual to another that is plaguing this world.

Remarkable indeed, Frankie! I can imagine what such a show delivers:" smoke comes from your ears" we say here.
Thanks for the explanation of sources. I said already: it needs a mixture of honesty, sarcasm, irony, humour and absence of prejudices
to deliver "Conscience"! THANKS!

Frankie,
I must admit,I hate it when an author "has to explain one's self"I think it should be left up to the reader to interpret as they will.I doubt anybody would view you,the Oz of ATL,to be apathetic or selfish or anything other than the kind,helpful person you are.I know you want to erase any shadow of a doubt,but it,kinda takes away from the artistry of a written work.I like to leave room for interpretation!When I wrote the sister song Real Problems,I put in things I support and some I may not.Its just a song!P.S. That fool in the story you told is typical of a murderer,"My conscience is clear and God will forgive me."

Thanks, Doug. I felt impelled to "erase any shadow of a doubt;" you said it well. And yes, moral "rightness" is typical of murderers, sadists, child abusers, and hardened violent criminals who have no conscience. "Their consciences are seared, as if burnt with a branding iron."

Originally Posted by Frankie Jasmine

Thanks, Doug. I felt impelled to "erase any shadow of a doubt;" you said it well. And yes, moral "rightness" is typical of murderers, sadists, child abusers, and hardened violent criminals who have no conscience. "Their consciences are seared, as if burnt with a branding iron."

I'd call it "moral nightness" Frankie!

Originally Posted by Doug Denslowe

Frankie,
I must admit,I hate it when an author "has to explain one's self"I think it should be left up to the reader to interpret as they will.I doubt anybody would view you,the Oz of ATL,to be apathetic or selfish or anything other than the kind,helpful person you are.I know you want to erase any shadow of a doubt,but it,kinda takes away from the artistry of a written work.I like to leave room for interpretation!When I wrote the sister song Real Problems,I put in things I support and some I may not.Its just a song!P.S. That fool in the story you told is typical of a murderer,"My conscience is clear and God will forgive me."

Doug, since there are those viewing the Forum in higher numbers than the membership, and since this is an international site (where it is easy to misunderstand intent because of language barriers), I also felt it necessary to express what I did. I understand what you mean about not "explaining" one's work. Many people feel that way. Still others are interested in how or why an idea developed, or what something means. I go with the flow.

You can skip my explanations if you like; I'll try to remember to head them, "Explanatory:" or "Explanation" so you'll know. . . . But if you're like me, you won't be able to skip it anyway, being a little nosy about what's going on!!!

Frankie,
Understood and nicely put!You're one of "the good guys!!!!"