Pump it up

((Hook))
I feel it rising the heat in the air that surrounds us
Thunder rumblin' in the back with lightning strikes downwards
Take a leap try to get ahead you fall behind don't start to fuss
You need to shush and keep going so in life you can move forward
((Verse 1))
You try to beat the best right from the start when your nothing but a runt
You complain that you shoulda won without trainin you deserve it for nothin
Dead serious look on your face little do you realize your acting like a ****
To get somewhere and earn an award you have to actually do somethin
Never start on top but claw your way up the frosted hill
May slip back down but you can stop and take a chill pill
Hard work determination like a fighter in the eight sided cage
Ready to fight and kill for what you want and meet your desires
Start with a walk you can't be born already runnin and jumpin
Skill comes with practice hard-work and possibly some age
Strikes like water but hit like stone face feels like its on fire
Try your best push your body place in life is now much higher
Keep it up and one day you'll be the king of the ring and the shire..
((Hook))
I feel it rising the heat in the air that surrounds us
Thunder rumblin' in the back with lightning strikes downwards
Take a leap try to get ahead you fall behind don't start to fuss
You need to shush and keep going so in life you can move forward
((Verse 2))
Near the top of the chain you face a humiliating and terrible defeat
Your strikes were hard but his were light fast hits were like caustic
Feeling agnostic there is no god you worked hard limbs prosthetic
You can fill the void by helping yourself out and trying it again
Hopefully come back and win so you can help lost ends amend
Climb back up to get ready for a bout get ready to kill the one you seek
Remember one thing don't start what you can't finish stay out if you can't handle the heat
Skill gets you up loses the others, determination makes you boss remember not to cheat
You can be the best no matter how deformed you are you just have to get up and try
If you lose a couple times it natural don't stray away and never start to cry
You can't make it if you don't give it all, don't be shy but don't be out-going
Gotta stand neutral, act like your an average person, that your not all- knowing..
((Hook))
I feel it rising the heat in the air that surrounds us
Thunder rumblin' in the back with lightning strikes downwards
Take a leap try to get ahead you fall behind don't start to fuss
You need to shush and keep going so in life you can move forward



That's all I have so far.. It's a free-style but I want to finish it with thought and some edits. Let me know guys!

Well, my first thought is that the rhyme in the hook "downwards" should be "around us" but only 'cos I felt a rhyme there. It's just 'cos with bars tht long I felt that every line should rhyme so the last one should change accordingly as well but that's just 'cos it's my opinion. I can feel a freestyle feel and I think the flow needs to be touched up a little, just making each bar feel the same and maybe the rhymes could be tighter. I like it though at the moment and I think it could be good with the touch up