here we go

Everybody wants to be famous
with as little effort possible
and the wanna act funny
when we make it
it funny how they're sunny
when they fake it
and how when my life's gettin good
they try to take it
and when them haters get to talkin
i never pay attention
cuz im doin my own thing
and i know that they'll listen

Im not world wide
but these people know my name
i know its in the name
but its not about fame
we all want fame
but we have to play the game
i tried to play the game
and saw nothing for me to gain
but i try and i try
hoping something catches my eye
i would give it all up
for a chance to be that guy
I want to save these kids
be the catcher in the rye

All these people put theyre problems on me
my friend jus called me up and said she had something to say
i wasnt really listening cuz i was havin a good day
shes mad at me and said im a bad friend
i wasnt tryna be mean
but storytellin just hadnt been planned
I could tell her stories
I could tell them stories
have them thinkin bout it in their late fourties
i've lived things they write books about
ran from things they sing hooks about
i've seen things and done things, fun things they get crooks about
dont know what these girls got me shook about
im stuck inside lookin out

Not that good at choruses so i left them blank

Ok this is what I have noticed. Your bars are incomplete is some areas...like the first one.

you said..
.Everybody wants to be famous with as little effort possible
and the wanna act funny when we make it
it funny how they're sunny

this is what it should look like, example...

Everybody wants to be famous with as little effort possible
and the wanna act funny like comedians at the Apollo

Now the line I put in there was Just a quick somthing...make sence of it..you need punch lines. make it you own...
another thing..there is a foundation to a correct 16 bar verse on you tube...[HbRBtlr2x-I]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HbRBtlr2x-I[/video]
this helped me out allot.. good luck...