fallen

Something I am working on let me know what youthink. I am also taking advise on what to add or take out W

We rise up
We stand alone
We watch the world end
Quickly as it begain
It all begains

In the end we are all alone
And no one comes to save you
No one seems to care
How do we destroy
Everything we ever lived for

Walk away
Walk away


We are the children of the fallen
Never forgotten

I wouldn't change a thing!You might consider putting "We rise"with the rest of the song lyric,other than that,love it!

Thanks. Where were you considering putting that at?

Originally Posted by Matt6660

Thanks. Where were you considering putting that at?

Right where you put it;first two words of the piece.By the way,I don't think you realize how great this is.I read it,it moves me.Really,really good.Classic!

Perfect lol. I was writing this thinking it was an ok song but very meaningful and now you all inspired me to.finish this peace.

Ponder each and every word.This is (IMO)as good as I've ever read,on this site or anywhere.Okay,I did find one little thing;How do we destroy ,Everything we've lived for.To me,you're speaking to someone.It's up to you,that's all I'd change.

how do you like that changed that to " we ever"?

Fine.You're on to something real good,I hope this gets the props it deserves.Matt,this will be hard to top.Try to,but don't be disappointed if this is the best thing you ever write.This is the best thing Ive read on this site.

i will not be disappointed on that cause i did something this good. Since i been posting on this site i only have been getting better and better i still remember my first post and i had no clue what to think about that and since then i have been moving on taking in advise and this is what i have become all thanks to you guys!!
thank you all!!!

When I went to the bank,yesterday,the girl at the window asked,"Are you taking out all your money?"I asked her why would I be doing that.She replied,"Tomorrow's the world's going to end!"Although she was only half serious,she was HALF SERIOUS!!I told her I had been through the last few "end of the world's"and I'd take my chances,yet again.When I came home and read this,it really hit a chord.Don't know in which key,but a chord,nonetheless.
We are the children of the Fallen
Never forget!

That means a lot that you can relate/feel the lyric.

What everyone think about this part 1 of part 2????

I am still blown away with this!!!! It been a while since i posted but am getting back.