The almost complete version....Koncept....Please comment...Thanks

Koncept – Written to Lil wayne – Shoot me down...still not complete can't write choruses so excuse if the chorus is a bit crap! and needs MAJOR editing!

Don't let your attitude determine your lattitude...
we can all go a lil further...push a lil harder...and sometimes...think a lil smarter...daaaaay-uuumn man...think what ya wanna...

If Dukey B is not me...
then i'm Jus a Koncept,
I'mma a Vision'ry of all omissions,
call me false prophet,
But what more do you ex---pect?
...Acceptance?..
When I leave this life
Find a Higher Place to Dwell
No word of a lie...
I did it all for the Hard Sell.
...Soft Cell...
no more me a Mortal,
So I sit back, wait for this all ta,
...blow over...
Duck and Cover,
I make this shell a Shelter.
Cos inside burned the fire...
so hot it could melt ya...
soul began to swelter,
and with that...
I'll give you something to yell ta*
(Fade out) *Chorus*
Now what did I tell ya?

Chorus
Words so Deep,
I call em metaphor,
open up your angel wings,
an' lemme see you soar, uhh... lemme see you soar
open up your angel wings
cos we gon' soar


In a Concrete Jungle,
all hell Broke loose,
Stampede to the flow
...Now I spare the Abuse
whats the use?...but
whats a Rope with No noose?
Hang ya head in shame,
We be pointing fingers,
...ask...
...who's really to Blame?
I 'spose it's only in God we trust
..In me I trust...
In the Race for Humans,
there's only Us,
There's no winner...only competition,
I'm on top of the Food chain
...I'm the Definition...
The be all, end all
is who I Be...and
Forever I am...Dukey B*...
My life is a soundtrack,
...I composed to the beat..
Relax your feet...
and look to the sky...
When you Recline the seat
I did it...I'm Doing it...
man i'm so high
you can clip my wings
but i've gotta stay fly*-aah-aah aah..aah aah (fade out)*
Go above and beyond in this atmosphere
I have no fear... it's my drive*
..on the brink of existence,
when time's up,
my species' extinct... all in an instant,
No regrets for when-
all is said and Done...
I'll be the remainder...
(fade out) Chorus
I'm The only one

Words so Deep,
I call em metaphor,
open up your angel wings,
an' lemme see you soar, uhh... see you soar
open up your angel wings
we gon' soar


Now I don't need a weapon,
i'm armed with a voice,
so- When I speak my mind...
i'll Use my weapon of choice,
I'mma revolutionary...now I'll bring the noise..cos-
My Vocabulary - is an establishment
of How I Sustain,
Exploitation?...so-*
Should I refrain?...leave a stain,
shall forver remain...*
Permenant resident....
within your membrane...
Or will my words reverbarate
And echo a sound of Injustice?
In..Just...this
I take a Verbal Knife...
and then twist
Delivery of perfection...a divine intervention...
Couldn't save you,
but* I i'll/ Offer you protection,
Under the wings of this angel,
I'll make it my mission
For one last time, this is it,
...man...it's my Vision...they'll diminish,
I'm finished...
(fade out) chorus
man I'm Finished

Words so Deep,
I call em metaphor,
open up your angel wings,
an' lemme see you soar, uhh... see you soar
open up your angel wings
we gon' soar


Copywrite Of Duke

It's getting better and better, but i have a question. What are the asterisks for? When i read the first version, i kept on thinking there were little notes at the bottom and i was going all crazy to find them. Hehe yeah, I'm kinda crazy!

they represent edit notes if i'm not happy with a line i'll re-edit it

Oh! that makes sense! wow i feel stupid.

aww lol it's cool it's my writing style i guess never happy, always strive for perfection lol

haha oh ok. i just scribble all over the place hoping to make some lines that actuall make sense!

i think you're doing a good job!

thanks, but you're just seeing the final versions hehehe

your songs are finished?

not really but they're FAR from what they were when i started lol

lol a start is a start!

yupperz it's better than nothing! It's just that i'm so disorganized!

tell me about it! i've got about 8 tracks in production right now and this is the closest to being finished, struggling with a chorus but thinking something along the lines of my words being a metaphor :S i dunno i'm rubbish when it comes to choruses! anyway it was something like....words from my heart, I call em metaphor, baby open up your angel wings, lemme see you soar, see you soar oooh lemme see you soar i dunno looool :S

i'm the exact opposite! when I'm really inspired the choruses to my songs come so effortlessly, but i'm always struggling to come up with verses that go along with it! but i like what you're thinking it's really good

maybe we should collaborate? lol

lol that's not a bad idea

yeah sounds like a plan i've gone with this chorus....I think?!?!

Words so Deep,
I call em metaphor,
open up your angel wings,
an' lemme see you soar, uhh... see you soar
open up your angel wings
we gon' soar
baby we on higher things

What do you think?

awww i think it's pretty. I don't get the last line though. can you explain it more?

i don't either just can't write choruses at all

Oh wow lol